tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post8904575831371586995..comments2023-10-15T04:23:50.187-04:00Comments on College Misery: Big Thirsty from Alex from Arizona: How Do You Keep It in Balance?Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-39711529412807170742010-12-01T17:57:33.490-05:002010-12-01T17:57:33.490-05:00Alex, I asked this question in my first year, too....Alex, I asked this question in my first year, too. The veteran I asked had taught for 40+ years and came in every morning with a big, genuine smile. He told me:<br /><br />1. Work is one of many equally important areas in life. The others include family, community, sexuality, spirituality, physical health, and creativity. Every week should include at least some of each area.<br /><br />2. Eskarinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14854383335265386899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-22923695516161360532010-11-28T12:15:48.452-05:002010-11-28T12:15:48.452-05:00One of my biggest problems is telling the differen...One of my biggest problems is telling the difference between "slacking" and "doing what I have to do to cope with a mental illness." On the other hand, people who don't know about the mental illness look at what I do and STILL say "Damn, that's a lot." <br /><br />So yeah. Whatever, slacking.<br /><br />From Atom Smasher (aka: Physics Boyfriend) I learned cmthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03814447289455034068noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-60271005985578622052010-11-26T21:52:22.272-05:002010-11-26T21:52:22.272-05:00Hang in there: as the others have observed, it doe...Hang in there: as the others have observed, it does get better after the first year. I can't offer you much advice on how to live a balanced life during your early years since I did such a lousy job of it (and it helped that I was single), but I can warn you to avoid a mistake I made: being too eager to please, and never saying "No" to anything. It didn't help that my departmentAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-34296221300463743512010-11-26T21:50:08.473-05:002010-11-26T21:50:08.473-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-16011062558348347992010-11-26T17:12:30.973-05:002010-11-26T17:12:30.973-05:00Issyvoo hit my big one. Don't work on the week...Issyvoo hit my big one. Don't work on the weekend. Just say to yourself that you'll never work past 5 pm or on Saturdays, or whatever. Make some time sacrosanct and never let the college bite into it. That will help.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-21883819841018081642010-11-25T23:25:44.874-05:002010-11-25T23:25:44.874-05:00I second Marcia, Ben, etc. This is the hardest yea...I second Marcia, Ben, etc. This is the hardest year. It will get better, and almost overnight. Just ride this out for now, and ask your partner, if you have one, to ride it out with you, promising him/her it'll get better. Advice: well, this advice contradicts some of the above posters', so take what you will from it. Leave all teaching prep and other teaching-related duties until the Casshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14265867663355826045noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-5936851557236874542010-11-25T15:59:22.277-05:002010-11-25T15:59:22.277-05:00I concur with most of the above advice. It does ge...I concur with most of the above advice. It does get better. Plan ahead. Take weekends if you can. Don't work after a certain time each evening, even if it means working through lunch. Give yourself permission to enjoy plebeian pleasures: bad television shows, the pub, whatever you prefer.<br /><br />My job has a teaching focus and I finally realized that I need not martyr myself to students Charlotte Issyvoohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11081140798331499819noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-21556093342029392872010-11-25T13:10:03.007-05:002010-11-25T13:10:03.007-05:00Here's the Lang book.Here's the <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0674047419?ie=UTF8&tag=ratyoustu-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0674047419" rel="nofollow">Lang book</a>.College Miseryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01371354682300032653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-5215266973682560562010-11-25T13:00:19.296-05:002010-11-25T13:00:19.296-05:00I always just ask this question: Will what I'm...I always just ask this question: Will what I'm worrying about matter in 5 years? If not, cut yourself a break on whatever it is.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-42640080622739508962010-11-25T12:20:58.603-05:002010-11-25T12:20:58.603-05:00As a person in her 4th year, I can say "Amen&...As a person in her 4th year, I can say "Amen" to Marcia's comments. <br /><br />My first year, I was always behind the 8 ball. I did not expect the work to be as overwhelming and all-consuming as it was. Plus, I was planning my wedding. As you know, that's a tad bit of work too :P <br /><br />After doing my best just to keep my head above what that year, I swore I would be Prissy Profhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06581053595119915513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-61409880190675608412010-11-25T12:01:05.600-05:002010-11-25T12:01:05.600-05:00I moved from adjunct to VAP to TT. I thought the V...I moved from adjunct to VAP to TT. I thought the VAP position would prepare me for the TT workload. I was wrong. The first semester, I felt as if I were working under water. In addition to my 5/5 load, I had a grant project, committee work, and a whole new city and department culture to adjust to. Oh, and I was also finishing my dissertation. It was so bad that when my father came to visit me EnglishDochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12046114978214062491noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-41777783082889227602010-11-25T11:54:41.156-05:002010-11-25T11:54:41.156-05:00May I suggest "Life on the Tenure Track: Less...May I suggest "Life on the Tenure Track: Lessons from the First Year" by James Lang. it's an easy read and may help you think things through..Middle-Aged and Morosehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09058963404500281265noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-54136895201037729572010-11-25T11:30:45.935-05:002010-11-25T11:30:45.935-05:00Marcia is right. It gets easier. You'll star...Marcia is right. It gets easier. You'll start devoting less time to work because you get the hang of it. Other things, like kids, are more interesting so you start to focus on them instead. It works itself out.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-86200129409058922262010-11-25T09:54:10.635-05:002010-11-25T09:54:10.635-05:00Alex, the first year is the hardest. By about 3 y...Alex, the first year is the hardest. By about 3 years in you feel like you're somewhat in charge of your life again. But in the meantime, establish some ground rules. Take one full day off a week. Have a once-a-week evening date. Do not work after dinnertime X days out of 7 (start with 1 besides date night, build up to 3 or 4). Insist on a hobby where you meet non-academics, who will Frog and Toadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06377542172335502858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-26939753229850851942010-11-25T09:07:28.007-05:002010-11-25T09:07:28.007-05:00About 8 months into my t-t position my wife turned...About 8 months into my t-t position my wife turned to me and said "You know, if we were to separate, the only difference would be that your salary would turn into a spousal support payment, and I would get the whole bed to myself for the whole night." Ouch. I'm grateful that my wife said that in such a blunt manner to wake me up, but it should never have gotten that bad in the Prof Poopieheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00997969128824319914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-87813097465094234492010-11-25T08:37:51.543-05:002010-11-25T08:37:51.543-05:00You keep it in balance by putting exercise first. ...You keep it in balance by putting exercise first. Get to the gym or rec center every day for a swim, run, walk ... whatever. That reduces the stress and gives you time to think about students, research, school, and life.frageramhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16200796760819825542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-68105490834576797372010-11-25T07:19:29.490-05:002010-11-25T07:19:29.490-05:00The job will take everything that you give it and ...The job will take everything that you give it and more, if you let it. I once quipped in a faculty meeting that it was good that we had such balanced job expectations: 80% of our time for teaching, 70% for research, and the remaining 30% for service and outreach.<br /><br />I recall a conversation with our old department head in which he noted that I was looking a little frazzled and suggested Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2883226237165701608.post-36983120922924501752010-11-25T06:49:03.861-05:002010-11-25T06:49:03.861-05:00For me, I was overwhelmed by the way the work neve...For me, I was overwhelmed by the way the work never ended. There is ALWAYS something more than has to be done. <br /><br />In the end, you have to have a self proclaimed stopping point, and then stick to it: a certain number of hours you are willing to devote to work, and then you turn it off. Otherwise, you'll work 24-7, because someone always sincerely needs you and your expertise....theAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com