Thursday, September 30, 2010

Physical Fitness

Dear Sporty Sorority Susie,

Yes, it IS a coincidence that we belong to the same gym. It is ESPECIALLY a coincidence because I joined this gym so that I could avoid running into Sporty Sorority Susies like yourself at our University Fitness & Eating Disorder Enabling Center. And it is a SUPER DUPER DUPER coincidence that we are both taking this deranged mockery of Latin dance that now passes for exercise in our modern world.

But even with all of these coincidences, there is no reason for you to ask me about your paper grade. No reason. At all. Now shut up and start doing that mambo turn for Calle Ocho, bitch.



  1. Sounds like Zumba! I had my own, not-so-fun experience yesterday in my Zumba class. My (male-ish) colleague now goes. He's a few rows behind me. This week started a new session complete with waaaaaaaay more ass-shaking and bending over than there used to be. I'd much rather have students in the class than colleagues.

  2. I was at a friend's house once. As often happens, I drank a lot. I walked home, pleasantly buzzed. It was like 11 P.M. I walked by Frat Row. One of my students spotted me and asked me about his paper. Dude! I was happy and drunk and now I am sad and drunk. :( I told him we'd discuss it in class.

  3. Wouldn't it be embarrassing to run into a student if one belonged to a swinger's club?

  4. @FFF...As an undergrad, one of my worst moments in Rustbelt City was running into my Geology prof dressed as a woman. Badly. Of course, I was dressed as a man (and at that point, I could totally work the Drag King look), but still. Yipes.

    @Prissy...I might tell that ol' zumba lie..."You know, if you're new, it's TOTALLY better if you're up front so you can see the instructor." Even though I mock it, I'm kind of addicted to it.

  5. @Froderick: Yes, if by "embarrassing", you mean "hilarious".


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