An Auld Acquaintance I'd Like to Forget

So, for those who are keeping score (and it seems there's quite a few), this is my first post, despite being an early adopter. Truth is, I had a damn fine semester. I even feared that a few of the sweet little cherubs might have begun to chip away at my crusty shell. All was set right, however, when this little darling sent some flakery my way after my last final exam of the term:

Hi Professor Misanthropologist,

So i just wanted to ask a couple of questions.

Unfortunately, I fear the lower case “i” will be the only sign of your humility in the following exchange.

One is that I'm still unable to see my grades on those projects on blackboard, every time I click on my grades it isn't showing the update.

That’s not really a question. Don’t get me started on the comma splice. In response, however, you submitted those projects to me nine hours ago. Has it not occurred to you that my workday entails more than sitting at my computer waiting for late assignments to trickle in? Relax. I don’t want to be held responsible for any repetitive stress injuries you incur through all that clicking.

With that, when and where will the extra credit be added into?

This semester, this course… unless you’ve stumbled upon some interest-bearing extra credit account in which you’d like me to deposit it.

Also, I'm going to be honest here, I'm extremely disappointed with my grade that I got on the final exam especially because this test turned out to be so many points, it is going to effect my grade drastically. I studied really hard for this text like all my others this week, and because I got an A on the midterm, I was not expecting this.

You have much to learn about causality. The test “turned out” to be worth exactly what the syllabus stated 14 weeks ago.

I've worked really hard at this class, and feel like I've improved a lot especially since I have no background with introductory basketweaving.

Believe it or not, I find that many students who take Basketweaving 101 have had little or no experience with the topic. I would consider adding a prerequisite, but most of the class somehow seemed to manage.

So my point is, is the final going to be weighted? Or are our projects weighted more than our test. Because I personally feel I deserved the A I had earned in this class, because of all the hours and effort I put in, and the improvement I made, and this one test is going to bring my whole grade down, along with my GPA.

Hmm. Maybe I didn’t hand you a syllabus… or perhaps I blocked your access to it on Blackboard. On a side note: While basketweaving may not be your thing, you seem to have some potential in mathematics. I mean, you seem to understand what happens on the right side of the “equals” sign. I’m sure someone in the math department can help you grasp the items on the left.

So if the test is not going to be weighted, is there anyway I can do something to make up some points in the next few days. Maybe a paper, research project, a basket, anything?

Of course. Because I find that most of the things you’re proposing are best accomplished in a few days. I look forward to taking time out of my break to evaluate whatever you hastily submit. May I assign it negative points?

I know I'm grasping at straws, but todays events have really upset me, and I figured why not try. If not I understand. Thanks.

Entitled Elaine

I admire your pluck; however, the series of increasingly frantic, less courteous emails that are to follow will convince me that you do not understand.

I'll keep the CMunity up to date if the emails continue. Hopefully there will be enough Scotch at the party tonight to blot her out until sometime after I get back to the office.