But now? These kids? They're stinking brats.
I had my first class of the spring semester yesterday and two students kept talking while I was distributing the syllabus and pointing out some sections to pay attention to.
"Could you fellas hold up while I'm talking?" I asked.
"You're not at the front of the room yet," one said, then he laughed.
"You're still bringing us our papers," the other said.
I kept going, and then headed up to the front.
"Okay, now you can talk," one of them said. I ignored it.
Ten minutes later one of them got up and left the room. I kept doing what I was doing, but when he tried to come back in a few minutes later I met him at the door and said, "Would you mind? I don't like being interrupted."
He just laughed. He didn't know I was serious.
When I kept standing there, his expression changed. "I had to go to the bathroom. You want me to pee in my pants
?" And his mood now was menacing, tough. No more laughter.His friend in the class said, "That's some kind of bullshit."
"Get out," I said, pointing at the kid at the door. "And you, too," I said, pointing at the kid inside.
"I PAID for this course," the kid at the door said.
"You FORFEITED your money then," I said.
My heart was racing. My face was flush. The one older student in the classroom, a large and gentle-faced man who sat up front, stood up and moved across the room until he was standing beside me. I gave him a glance and mouthed the words "Thank you" to him.
The two students saw this new force in the dynamic as someone to worry about. I'm 120 lbs. My new friend was 300+.
The students sullenly grabbed their backpacks
. One said, as he left, "See you Wednesday," and the other said, "Not likely."I felt like a victory when the door closed. The older gentleman smiled at me and returned to his seat; he still hadn't spoken.
Then a student in the back said, "That was so harsh." And her friend said, "She kicked him out because he had to pee."
Bravo, Janet, on standing up for yourself and--by extension--the students in class who actually want to be there.
ReplyDeleteSounds like your day was like mine, for which I am profoundly sorry. (I was going to joke about you losing me after the first question--to which I answered, "No," but I thought that would be too cruel.)
And lest you think that you're treated this way because you are a slender waif of 120 lbs., you're incorrect. You may have felt as though you were more of a target, but you could be as large as your new 300-pound friend and still be a treated in exactly the same way. Exactly.
I think there are plenty of big men that read this blog that would argue that gender doesn't make a difference, either, with this particular brand of student.
I'm a substantial girl with a good sense of humor and a firm but polite take-no-shit disposition. If you read my post from yesterday, you'll see that I get the same crap you do.
I've had students get up in the middle of lectures to go out and use the facilities, or, whatever and I find it extremely disruptive. I gets to the point that I need to remind them they are expected to maintain a civil demeanor and be respectful to their fellow students and myself.
ReplyDeleteI also remind them that, as a 55 year old male, if I can make it through the lecture without having to run out to use the toilet, I cannot see why a 19 year old cannot as well.
Are you really in Jersey? Wow! Here at Harvard South, we don't start until the day after MLK Day.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure I completely agree with Greta (much as it pains me). I got a great deal of this type of behavior when I started her 15 years ago, but it has actually decreased over time. Probably a couple of things helped: I got older and a bit fatter, I started wearing a wedding ring and mentioned that my husband is a cop, and my reputation as a bitch has been trumpeted on The Other Site.
I really do think that certain male members of this generation are just as sexist as previous generations. Standing up for yourself as you did is a great way to nip this in the bud. Congratulations!
Bravo, Janet. If those two in the back give you any more aggravation, I hope you tell them, "You're next!"
ReplyDeleteFrod spots the salient point. Those 2 in the back missed the whole fucking point of this event!!! There is more trouble to come for Janet, and I hope she continues to stand strong!
ReplyDeleteYou are the weakest link....good bye!
ReplyDeleteI'm with Frod. If you hear a peep out of either of them next class, just fix them dead in the eye and ask "Would you also like to forfeit the tuition for this course? If not, I'd suggest you keep your mouth shut and your ears and eyes open. You might learn enough to pass."
ReplyDeleteI have yet to deal with this level of rudeness, as my students don't have quite the sense of entitlement they might have had if they'd grown up with money.
Yeah, the 2 in the back should have been kicked out too and told, "Show some respect and save your comments about me for after class. You may come back Wenesday or drop the class."
ReplyDeleteAnd then say, "Anyone else wanna drop? Leave now so the rest of the class can get the course I am being paid to teach them."
Now pray your "new friend" is a decent student.
Unfortunately this sort of thing is all too common. I know a lot of profs who make their policies very clear in the syllabus — no laptops, no late entry, etc. That way, if the student doesn't like it, he can drop the course and spend his dime elsewhere, and can't claim later that he didn't know the deal.
ReplyDeleteJames J, policies in syllabi are routinely ignored by both students and admin. It's a sad but true fact that the syllabus is not a perfect apotropaic against snowflakery.
ReplyDeleteFF is right that the 300-pounder has too much leverage now. Find a way to repay the favor before you start grading him on anything. And be obvious about it.
ReplyDeleteI think the attitude with which people take a break and let themselves back in matters.
ReplyDeleteI began having IBS problems towards the end of grad school (but I didn't know what it was, I just knew I had to poop NOW out of utterly nowhere). I didn't have a doctor's note (yet) but since I found it utter humiliating to have to leave repeatedly I would wait as long as I could, leave quietly, come back in more so, and always sit near the door.
Because it was humiliating I also would say I just had to pee if asked. I'm pretty sure my profs thought I had a bladder the size of a Pomeranian's that year.
The most ridiculous thing about the classic "but I paid for this course" line, is, of course, the fact that the complainer probably didn't.
ReplyDeleteYou go, girl! Kudos for standing tall the first day. Thank the gods, I've never had such in-your-face brats. Report their asses.
ReplyDeleteBut I have had mutterers, like yours in the back, and I agree that you should come down hard on them ASAP. I've made the mistake of waiting, and paid the price.
My college is like Viva's, and the forms are available online. Now I sometimes fill out the form before class (except for the date of the incident), sign it, and make 2 copies so it's ready to hand to the student as needed. (One copy stays with me; one goes to the Dragon Lady.)
As for your 300-pound guardian angel, I agree that this is a debt to settle before grading starts. I've thanked helpful students with a roll of Lifesavers (duh) and with a candy bar whose name was the same as the student's. In case he's diabetic, maybe a $5 cash card for a coffee shop?
Be prepared for the pushback. If they complain to the chair or Dean, you've got to be ready with your rationale. In my experience, you've only got one shot to make your case, at the moment you're confronted with it, otherwise you've got to eat crow and let the students back in, which is real aggravating. I wasn't fully convinced by my doctor that the ulcer I had several years back was from the medication I was taking.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice that you received support from your physically imposing older student, but you don't actually need it. A quick call to the campus police will resolve the standoff with the belligerent students.
ReplyDeleteI do think size helps. I'm a young-ish woman, but 300+ pounds, and I have yet to encounter this sort of disrespectful behaviour. (I'm also friendly and very respectful of my students, but polite and firm when needed.) Maybe I've just been lucky so far, but I think the combination of a few years of age on most of my students, my consistent displays of respect for them, and my I-could-really-hurt-you-if-I-wanted-to size has been a winning formula for me.
ReplyDeleteEskarina: "In case he's diabetic, maybe a $5 cash card for a coffee shop?"
Uh, where did this assumption come from?
CDP - that's not necessarily true. Our police department is contaminated with a couple of assholes who will go out of their way to do nothing. I once needed to be let into my building on a Saturday. As soon as I walked up to the counter and saw who was manning the window, I should have just gone home. She took my driver's license and faculty ID and closed the top half of the dutch-door. Then assuming a 1/2" hollow fake wood door was sound proof, she called up to her supervisor and said "This woman is here trying to get into Science Building... I don't know, she just said she used to be a student or something and she doesn't even have any ID." wtf?
ReplyDeleteThis same asshole gives people parking tickets for being parked in the wrong lots. Like if you're faculty and you park in visitor parking, or if you're a visitor and you park in faculty etc. Sounds perfectly reasonable, right? Except it's all bullshit. She just tickets you wherever you park and when you go to protest, she says "Well how can you prove you were parked in faculty parking?" so once I took pictures. She said "I don't know you didn't move your car before you took these pictures."
I could skype that bitch while being strangled by a student and she'd say "Can you even prove you're a professor?" then when I didn't answer, she'd hang up on me and go ticket my car.
And on many campuses, clods like Mrs. Ticketmaster are armed!
ReplyDeleteBet the gun gets rusty from not being oiled.
Oh, the KampusKops stories I can tell!
ReplyDeleteHow about the one when an ociffer ticketed a student in a motorized wheel chair for operating a motor vehicle without a seatbelt?
Or the one when the Cheef was invited to New Student Orientation and punctuated every sentence about What Not to Do with the phrase, "or I'll arrest ya!" at a commuter community college.
And that doesn't even scratch the surface.
Ugh. My mistake. Sorry, Wombat.
ReplyDeleteIf you read this, I'm a student.
ReplyDeleteThanks for doing that, and that makes you an awesome prof in my book. Arrogant self centered losers like that forfeit their education. Its a privilege for many, paid by mom and dad, with no appreciation for any sort of learning.
Thanks from a grateful student