Friday, April 1, 2011


Students Treat Professors With Healthy Alternatives

By Landon Pope, Health.com
April 1, 2011 5:00 p.m. EDT
Cereals made from whole grains appear to protect against hypertension
Students are bringing healthier snacks to evaluation day
STORY HIGHLIGHTS

  • Eating cereal regularly may be an easy and practical way to prevent hypertension for hard working professors
  • Nuts, raisins, or fruit often added to cereal contain fiber and potassium, which can help lower blood pressure and increase stool size among college professors
  • Prolonging a proffie's life a key to continued academic success

RELATED TOPICS
(Health.com) -- 
For the past several years, college professors like Mike Degarret (Ithaca College) have looked forward to student evaluation day.
"My students have been bringing me food and treats ever since I started teaching," Degarret said. "But recently I've noted a real change in the types of foods. It used to be donuts and cupcakes, but now students - who always seem more concerned for me and other professors than themselves - have been bringing in egg white omelettes, nutritious cereals, and a variety of anti-oxidant laden juices instead."
Of course it's long been a perk of the academic life to be treated like royalty by grateful students, but this new generation seems especially interested in helping professors make healthy choices when it comes to classroom treats.
Mark Borland, a junior at San Diego State University, says, "We really love what professors do for us, the long hours, the grading of our essays, and we want to keep them around for a long time. While students before us brought sugary foods, we're trying to make good choices so our proffies know how much we love them.

17 comments:

  1. The Contemplative CynicMarch 31, 2011 at 11:32 PM

    Wait, first of all, I NEVER get fed by students. EVER. Now I have another reason to be cynical. Thanks. A. LOT! :o)

    ReplyDelete
  2. The Contemplative CynicMarch 31, 2011 at 11:33 PM

    OK... is this an early April Fool's? was I just totally April Fooled? :o)

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMarch 31, 2011 at 11:40 PM

    What sort of rareified air is being breathed at these schools? My students have never brought me a snack healthy or otherwise. It makes me want to drive to Ithaca - but who'd want to go there anyway - and smack the shit out of that guy.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousMarch 31, 2011 at 11:48 PM

    You had me until "stool size." Whoever did this has given me a great treat!!! RYS-style with the April Fool's hijinx. Love it...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Academic MonkeyApril 1, 2011 at 12:39 AM

    My students brought me flowers today. It was written in the syllabus, towards the end, and each one of them found it and complied. One brought me two dozen roses!

    ReplyDelete
  6. StrelnikovApril 1, 2011 at 2:07 AM

    This just in: Ghaddafi may be Jewish, film at 11.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 4:10 AM

    Very cool, Leslie, Fab, whoever.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 4:28 AM

    A delicious spoof everyone! Thanks for the chuckle.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Mrs. CApril 1, 2011 at 5:19 AM

    Gee, I had forgotten how very like hairy testicles poppy buds are.

    ReplyDelete
  10. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 8:09 AM

    Meh.

    This is pretty lame.

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 8:23 AM

    Oh god! I was going to really go off on these nuts in the fake story. Thank goodness I read the comments first.

    I admit. I got got. Happy April Fool's Day, everyone.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Mrs. CApril 1, 2011 at 9:57 AM

    What? You've offed the hairy balls?! And in favor of some double-knit grandma polyester blend print that the uncool wore in the 60s? Are you WHACK?! (mebbe i shoulda sent this as an email)

    ReplyDelete
  13. College MiseryApril 1, 2011 at 10:06 AM

    Mrs. C, you should know by now that nothing that we do has anything to do with what readers THINK of us...haha.

    CM Moderation Inc.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 10:33 AM

    I was fooled. Kudos.

    ReplyDelete
  15. EskarinaApril 1, 2011 at 2:08 PM

    Beautiful! In every detail!

    ReplyDelete
  16. schnitzelbankApril 1, 2011 at 11:23 PM

    I once had a student offer me a sandwich he had tucked inside his shirt. Does this count?

    ReplyDelete
  17. The Contemplative CynicApril 2, 2011 at 1:15 PM

    @Julie, and how did you resist taking a bite?

    ReplyDelete

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