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| Would you want THIS guy to save you? |
Without comment, I will present a series of images below, all taken from training, some of them showing my actual answers to questions. There were six modules, 10 questions each, and each was preceded by a whiz-bang Powerpoint presentation narrated by a guy whose voice was made for the silent movie era.
After each presentation you took the afore-mentioned quizzes. You HAVE to score 70% or higher to pass...well, eventually you have to score 70% or higher as I shot a bagel on the last module for fun and took the thing 3 times before I finally got the "CONGRATULATIONS!" banner.
Two of the presentations seemed overly long (one on fire safety that started with, "A fire can be very dangerous to buildings and their inhabitants"), so I skipped it and took the quiz blind. 70%, baby. and "CONGRATULATIONS."
The one thing that I'm actually serious about is the responsibility all the training puts on me. This notion that I'm in charge of the lives of any visitors or students on campus in case of an assailant, bomb threat, hostage taker, tornado, fire, or tsunami (we have no ocean anywhere near us, by the way), makes me uncomfortable. Am I really NOT supposed to run out of the building if it's on fire? I'm supposed to, obliged to, help EVERYONE around me first? What are the rest of them doing? Are students sitting in their chairs wondering about the midterm? Aren't they going to be running? And what about my supervisor? Is she being told in her training, "Make sure your full time faculty get out first...leave the adjuncts to fend for themselves"?
And all the hostage taker / active shooter suggestions make it seem as if I'm supposed to be the one to make the decision to try to escape or actually "TAKE OUT" the assailant. This isn't Texas, for shit's sake.
I don't know. I should maybe create more of a narrative for this post, but since the page is going to shit anyway, here are some images. You can provide the context yourself.
TP
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Oh, these trainings are more fun in person. I did one last year and the crowd laughed throughout all the quizzes, sometimes shouting out the sillier options.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite was a lot like the suspicious package one above.
One option was: "Attempt to detonate it yourself."
You were joking about the students thinking about the midterm during a fire but snowflake syndrome doesn't vanish in an emergency.
ReplyDeleteWe had a total campus lockdown this past fall. This IS Texas. The authorities responded with a tank. During the middle of the whole mess I saw a student try to leave the building we were all hiding in. He was stopped, but he made a scene arguing that he had to get to a quiz!
If the person is killing people, I need to ACT? Crap. I can't act. I was booed off stage in my 4th grade play. I was tree #4.
ReplyDeleteAnyone take the predator training in the public schools? It's like an icky how-to manual for sexual assault.
ReplyDeleteI do a bit of emergency management work for my side-job, and I'm also an EMT. I agree, the modules for training the general public are just awful.
ReplyDeleteHaving been the first responder to some accidents (and not always in a professional capacity, just as a bystander), I can say that it is actually very valuable to give some thought to what your role and response would be in case of particular scenarios. Having a protocol that you can fall back on in a chaotic situation helps everyone, and also keeps you from doing something well-meaning but harmful. Often our instinct to jump in and help can actually make a situation more dangerous.
I would say to ignore the silliness and try to make the training relevant if you can.
I love how well-written question 10 is. SOOOOOOO professional. (I am assuming these are screen-captures...)
ReplyDeleteThis is why this (probably) high-priced "training" is a joke.
My schools don't pay adjuncts' health insurance. If there's a shooter, I am ducking behind the stoner in row 1.
I reviewed the "In Case of Emergency" instructions now posted by the door of every classroom. In case of shooter, I am supposed to upend the computer desk and place it against the door. I tried. The thing's bolted to the floor. I'm with The_Myth; I'll hide behind the football player in the back row.
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