We are in the second week of the second term of summer classes and the excuses have started rolling in. Some are valid, such as "I had surgery, I have documentation to prove it." Awesome! Turn it in and let's get this train rolling! Others have been less than awe inspiring. "I ha too many classes and was going to drop some but wasn't sure which, can I make up the first weeks work I didn't do?" Ohhhh, outta luck bucko! See the syllabus, no late assignments except in case of documented emergencies. What are the best (or worst) excused students have given you for late work this summer?
Unless it's a major emergency and the total of assignments missed is worth at least a half a letter grade, there will be no makeups. This is on the syllabus. I go over it the first week of class, tell them I enforce it, and remind them they may not like me very much because of it but that's the way it's going to be throughout the term.
ReplyDeleteHere are my crappy summer excuses:
1. I didn't get the books till the third week of class because I registered late.
2. I had a sore throat. Here's my note from the Minute Clinic.
3. But I wasn't here last class. You can't expect me to have the work for this class.
4. I scheduled a week's vacation before I registered for this class.
If you have any doubts as to the response these received, please reread the first paragraph.
"I didn't register! Someone else did it from my IP address!"
ReplyDeleteLol love #3 and #4. No one has been ballsy enough to send me those excuses yet but I know it is only a matter of time!
ReplyDeleteI went through this today, almost at the end of the 7th out of 8 weeks:
ReplyDeletehi professor,
i tried to log in to web-based course engine today and got the notice your subscription has expired. did u drop me? please let me know what to do.
lazy fuckstain
My Response:
LF,
As it states in the syllabus, I am not Tech Support. You need to contact Web-Based Course Engine Support.
PfP
Lazy Fuckstain's Reply:
helo agan professor,
if they don't figure it out until the due date, will i fail class?
LF
My Response:
Yes.
Even if WBCE is unable to figure it out quickly (which I doubt; they’re usually very good), you will have earned a failing grade.
1) You activated your enrollment in the WBCE course on the first day of the Summer term, so access has not been an issue.
2) You waited 4 weeks from the first day of Summer term to complete 1 section of material (out of 48).
3) You waited another 2½ weeks to contact me about this issue.
You have had plenty of opportunity to make progress and have not. There is nothing I can do for you.
LMAO Pat!!!! Lazy fuckstain. Gawd that's funny!
ReplyDeleteI don't teach summer school, but last quarter I got this doozy: I registered for 10 classes and dropped some but forgot which so I've been going to the wrong class, the one I dropped instead of yours.
ReplyDeleteUm. And this is my problem how?
WOAH! Holy design flaw in your university's system F&T, to have something that even allows such enrollment.
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right...not your problem!
I used my financial aid to buy rims for my car. That's why I can't buy the book. You wanna take a spin in my car after class?
ReplyDeleteI did once have an advisee tell me she missed her window to sign up for classes because she was in line for Jay-Z tickets.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to respond, "I've got 99 problems, and your enrollment ain't one," but I refrained.
3. But I wasn't here last class. You can't expect me to have the work for this class.
ReplyDelete4. I scheduled a week's vacation before I registered for this class.
to which FML laughed,
No one has been ballsy enough to send me those excuses yet.
I've had #4 twice. For real. It'd be funny if it weren't so sad that they really think they're entitled to schedule vacations in the middle of the term and not get penalized for it.
Who the hell taught 'em that anyhow? When it's the parents who are scheduling the vacations...
Answering my own question... in high school, I think. Kids get out for appointments, a couple days early for holiday travel, etc, etc. My apologies to high school teachers who have to put up with that.
ReplyDelete