I will be ostracized by my colleagues. The Dean will threaten to fire me, revoke tenure. The social shame can't even be calculated.
You think people want to buy those Yaro lady PJs? Who'd wear them? One's husband or lover would know you were a CM reader (maybe even a dreaded correspondent!), and you would never recover from.
I'm ashamed that I even know your address. I try to block it out of my head, but it's so damn easy. CollegeMisery Dot Com. What could be easier? But yet, what could be more dangerous.
PLEASE let this all be a warning, a cathartic break from your evil. SHUT IT DOWN!!!
Oh, and PS, for all of us on the map below. Stay inside; be safe.
-- Ace from Atlantic City
That is sorta funny, the map tying into the earlier stats map.
ReplyDeleteAnd I join Ace in my utter fear of being OUTED as a dirty CMmer, and in my hopes that the heavy rains and high winds take it easy on the northeast.
I will wear the Yaro PJs with pride. I think they would sell even better if Yaro himself promised to wear them first.
ReplyDeleteI think we should all get Yaro pjs and wear them to the first day of class. Even those who don't teach on line.
ReplyDeleteAce, just hang tight and listen to your old mix tapes of 10cc, Pink Floyd, Hawkwind, and Bloodrock....use the old Radio Shack boombox, the one powered by 15 C cells; remember that one?
ReplyDeleteShine on, you crazy diamond....
@Strelnikov: Mine had 6 D cells instead, which periodically burst their bonds and scattered all over the floor of my '62 Chevy (which didn't have a built-in radio or tape deck, but did have so much steel that it several times survived being hit by falling trees with no more than windshield damage).
ReplyDelete@Annie: add wearing the pjs on the first day of class (which, yes, is face to face for me this semester) to the list of things I would do if I had tenure. I may not be quite as fearful as Ace claims to be, but I'm not career-suicidal either, and, as someone pointed out under the pj thread, they might not look quite as fetching in size XXL. If somebody put Yaro's mug on a mug or magnet, I'd be more likely to buy that (though maybe still not display it at school, at least not in my own office). Also, I'm not sure I want to set a precedent that might have my students showing up in pjs all semester; they complain enough about early-morning classes as it is.
@Contingent Cassandra
ReplyDeleteThey built them like tanks back then, didn't they? Better than the Austin Mini (Morris Cooper), where you could do bodywork with your bare hand or a small rubber mallet....Only downfall of the primitive fiberglass body of the East German Trabant was that it shattered if you hit a tree, and that gaffer (duct) tape was hard to find in places like Essen. We didn't need the Trabant; our own kludgemobile was the Zaporozhets 966, which only carried two people, was shaped either like a Fiat 500 or an NSU Prinz, and reached terminal velocity at 50 mph. Putin owns one as a joke.
I was exaggerating about the batteries, but the average boombox felt like it had a car battery inside.