Monday, September 26, 2011
Snowflake Smackdown, Chrome-style
Snowflakes Trixie (in her girlie football jersey and heavy makeup) and Dopey (Trixie's non-too-bright sidekick) sit in the back row, and they're talking while I'm trying to explain that the paper isn't due Wednesday, it's now due next Monday (you're welcome) and what all has changed with the new calendar and they're still talking. Loudly.
And because I had spent the weekend in MyKindaTown with friends, drinking and laughing and having the kinds of conversations about art, music, philosophy, and sex that I cannot have with these children I teach four days a week--I lost it.
"What the hell are you two talking about that is so important?? I AM TALKING HERE. SHUT UP AND LISTEN. If you cannot do that, I will separate you permanently for the semester, or I will ask you to leave, because you are incredibly irritating and rude."
And without skipping a beat, continued to explain the pertinent changes to our schedule before firing up my lecture for the day.
I don't feel like I was out of line. I feel like they are fucking lucky that I don't believe in physical violence, because this is the second time since the start of the semester on 9/8 that I have to call the two of them out and I was really feeling like just cracking their heads together like a couple of coconuts.