I teach a course, Introduction to Small Mammal Brain Function, that is a graduation requirement for all students. It is an upper class course and throughout the years, I've had rather mixed experiences. However, this is what put me on the trajectory to share my misery. This is a rather long, long rant. I apologize. And, it's not special misery but it is mine.
Athlete Alan, who is also a fifth-year senior, decided that his personal woes of his non-eligibility for his Podunk team would justify him not showing up to the first three weeks of class. Since this is a graduation requirement and in the ever-holy name of retention, I contacted Alan's academic adviser....numerous times. I wouldn't have known who Alan was if he walked up and stood an inch from me, so I had no recourse to track him down in any other way. Finally, on my last attempt, the adviser replies only this: "I thought this would be a problem. Okay." Ummm?....Alan shows up the following week and says that he is in the throes of a terrible semester that I probably "don't understand." You know, it's hard not being able to grunt and scratch your jock as a part of a team. I try to politely faux- sympathize ...but say that since he's already missed the allotted amount of absences, it would be best if he dropped the class and picked it up again. "Oh, no, Ms. Holly. That won't be necessary. I'll be here and I'll work really, really hard. I have to pass this class or my parents will kill me."
Alan shows up to the library instruction day, which is also the day before spring break, dressed to hit the golf green."Um, Ms. Holly, are we going to be in here the whole time today? I have a tee time that I need to make."
Alan ignores all instruction about a rather important project and misses all three deadlines that have been scaffolded in to "protect" flakes like him. But, he does turn in something and manages to squeeze out a barely passing grade.
The last day of class, writes me a frenetic e-mail "Ms. Holly, I am having an extreme panic attack due to this class." Nothing else in the body of that email. And this was during CLASS TIME. WTF?
Then, in the 48 hours ensuing that odd declaration, I get TEN god damned email messages from him including: a) I had fifty million dermatology appointments for my terrible acne; I can give you my doctors' notes; b) Can I make up the missed work from the first month or so of class?; d) I'm having an extreme meltdown right now!; e) I worked really hard on the final paper, but you know I'm not the best writer so can you please be gentle on me?; f) My parents have sent out my graduation announcements and I can't not walk; g) If I don't get a C, can you get me some extra credit? ...This is electronic harassment!
And then the final crazy straw was that I received an e-mail from one of the loon's parents with their precious flake's name in the subject line (not like I might not have other students with the same name, or anything...) demanding to know what his final grade was. And I received the email twice.
Alan's final paper was turned in and it has been scanned for potential academic misconduct issues and (luckily?) passes those litmus tests. However, his grade isn't due until the day before graduation and it will be submitted two fucking minutes prior to the deadline since he will get just enough credit to satisfy the requirement.
And then, I discovered another great scenario...a group of wonderful, earnest students handed in the same paper in the same fucking class. How fucking dumb do they think I am? And one of the douchebags is slated to graduate. I was told then that probably none of the students has a history of cheating (not fucking bloody likely, but more like the professors in their field are lazy or apathetic like the students) that I would not be supported failing the graduate. But, I can go ahead and line up for the blood bath if I'd like to stand my ground..y'know, because it's my choice and all.
Lastly, I get an email from a sullen CC-transfer student that was in this same circus of a class saying "You we're to harsh on me and my project i deserf better. I am talking to your superviser." Yet, did she do the optional last assignment to pull up her grade from this supposed injustice? You know the answer to that one.
What in god's name is in the fucking water lately?
- Humanity Holly
This is so similar to what I'm dealing with right now that I actually feel better knowing it isn't just me. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteJeebus. This is awful.
ReplyDeleteVent, Holly. Vent your spleen. You might feel better, you might not, but we're listening. And believe me, we feel your pain.
Just keep swimming...
Tell him he didn't need to see a derm. He just needed to quit the steroids now that his utility to his team has expired. Tell him disposable people like him don't need to maintain their bulk; it won't be needed to operate the register at Sports Authority.
ReplyDeleteYikes.
ReplyDeleteIdentical papers? No support for failing the student? Just bundle up the bunch and send it to the Academic Integrity Committee, or Judicial Board, or whatever it's called at your institution. Let them make the call: if they want the responsibility for foisting these failures on the world, let 'em.
And how did the Athlete earn a pass, when he'd flunked attendance? Or did he actually hold the line and show up the rest of the term?
I did something a little evil this term. I weighted late-semester attendance more heavily than early-semester attendance.
Indeed, evil, but deliciously evil!
Delete@Holly: You we're to harsh on me and my fellow CM commenterz i deserf better. I am talking to Leslie.
ReplyDeleteOh, dear, Holly. Well, it sounds like Alan's sorted (and disposed of -- there are some upsides to his graduation, such as that you won't have to deal with him any more), and the CC-transfer can probably be dismissed with some variation of "be my guest" (I'm lucky in that my department requires written grade complaints; just sending the students the link to the instructions is usually enough to scare them off).
ReplyDeleteBut the cheating douchebags? If it's that blatant, I think you really have to run them through whatever system you have, whatever failings it may have. It's possible that one of them is innocent (with the others stealing from him/her), but they can't all be, and you can't just let that sort of case go.*
*Unless, of course, you're contingent or untenured and you're getting strong signals from those with the power to renew your contract and/or tenure you to drop it. If that's the case, I'd also be looking for another job or career (easier said than done, I know). Either way, try to get the advice from higher-ups in writing/pixels, and store copies off-campus (and campus servers).
I'm full time... But untenured. I already made my stand several years ago and it was AWFUL. I don't feel I can rock the boat again. And I am also one of those ABDs...so finding another job could prove very difficult. My field of study is Medieval Literature of Transatlantic dust... No jobs for the amount of debt I'd incur to finish.
DeleteI'm in a similar position (except for finishing my Ph.D. while I was in my current job, which has given me a bit more job security -- eligibility for a multi-year contract -- but that's about it). But my department and upper administration are supportive, so I'm lucky enough to be able to just keep filling in the paperwork, and waiting for someone else to deal with the problem, and let me know what the penalty is so I can file a final grade. I've always been satisfied, if not delighted, with the outcome. I haven't had a same-paper-from-several-students case at my present institution, however; those *are* especially tough, unless one can find an original they all copied. I had two such cases at two prior institutions, and neither came out well, in my opinion.
DeleteSo, bottom line? You need to treat all the douchebags (graduating or not) the same, but if your experience suggests that the system doesn't work in these cases, then I don't think you're obligated to knock your head against that wall again.
It would, however, be nice to be able to do something. Do you have any leeway to require an alternative assignment, such as having them all come in and write some sort of in-class thing, independently, on more or less the same subject with more or less the same materials? That would be one reasonably-fair way to get a sense of which (if any) of them actually know the material, and have mastered whatever writing skills you're testing through the assignment.
Or, alternatively, run them through the system, but try not to put too much energy into it, or care too much, or expect too much of anyone else; just dump it as dispassionately as possible in the laps of those charged with dealing with such cases, and, once they've made a decision, follow their directions as far as final grades, penalties, etc., go. I'm not sure whether that would count as rocking the boat or not; it strikes me as simply expecting the people charged with dealing with these problems to do their jobs (I understand their reluctance to deal with this kind of mess at this time of year, but it *is* part of their job).
So, make yourself and/or your colleagues a bit uncomfortable if necessary (it's not a comfortable situation), but don't jeopardize your job.
Alan showed up to the rest of the class sessions after his vacation in January. But, of course, everyday he was the first out the door and the first to email me with inane questions that were answered ad infinitum in class! I have other students who did end up failing due to attendance, so I have to give him that much. And as for the cheating students, I went to a supervisor who said she agreed with my findings and that she'd support me.
ReplyDeleteBut there would be two other reviewers higher than she
and I have already been overturned once in a VERY
similar case. It was a very unpleasant affair that I'd like
to avoid again. So not only am I annoyed, but also I am
disappointed in the standards that are set. I'm only a cog
but it's a lose-lose situation.
It sounds like a small dose of the Pit or the Pendulum, yes.
DeleteWell, if you can't fail 'em, give 'em D's. Then, if they want to appeal, it's they who are rocking the boat, not you.
But you can't give them credit for work they didn't do.
Grade penalties strike me, too, as appropriate -- *if* you can be sure that one of them isn't the original author of the paper. That's the problem with identical-paper cases; there may be an innocent party. The fact that there are apparently more than two identical papers reduces the chances of that, I think, but it's still a possibility.
DeleteI do think the line between "unpleasant" and "job-jeopardizing" is important. If filing charges would merely be unpleasant, then I suggest it's best to do so, try to minimize your own emotional investment (and, to the extent possible, the time cost to your colleagues), and move on, assuming your colleagues will do the same (the summer heals many minor wounds).
If, on the other hand, you think you're getting indications that your contract might not be renewed if you continue to make waves, then, yes, I think it's time to accept your cog status and do whatever the more powerful gears in the machine tell you to.
"But there would be two other reviewers higher than she
Deleteand I have already been overturned once in a VERY
similar case."
Maybe therein lies the problem. They smoke dope with the students.
It's unfortunate that in the name of retention you can't just fail them. What better way to retain students than to make them take classes over again until they pass them? Not to mention the revenue stream that would continue until they got their heads out of, er, the clouds.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, the culture is, "If at first you don't succeed, quit." Saying "try, try again" presupposes that effort was expended the first time, despite their passionate avowals that "I tried really hard! (I showed up for class occasionally.)"
I think it's something in the atmosphere . . . maybe pre-rumblings leading up to the Mayan Apocalypse? Cause the flakery seems to be nation- (if not world-) wide right now. In my (admittedly short; I'm ABD) time teaching, I've never had anyone complain to anyone but me about their grades, but this semester I had three meetings with students, two who were "very concerned" about their grades (one took my math and said okay and went home, the other decided I had something personal against her and went to my chair [who is a wonderful person and backed me] and will probably be appealing her grade), and one who had plagiarism issues on her final paper (and whose mother called my chair, who backed me on this issue, as well. She's the best chair ever). Then there was the super keener with the B+ who tried to argue me up two percentage points.
ReplyDeleteI am SO GLAD this semester is over, and I hope it takes whatever the hell was wrong with it on its way out.
"I am SO GLAD this semester is over, and I hope it takes whatever the hell was wrong with it on its way out."
DeleteYou hit the nail right on the head here. I have had a shitty semester as well and could not have said it better.
My university allows us to set our own percentage-to-grade equivalency (or has until now; next year we all go to a university standard). My department uses a non-standard equivalency, where A+ starts considerably higher than the standard grading scheme, as do A, A- and B+. I go over this on the first day on the syllabus and point it out, and of course the syllabus is available to them on the web.
DeleteEvery couple of years I will get an inquiry from a student about why they didn't get a B+ when they had xx%. I point them to the syllabus.
This year I had 8 inquiries. Snarky, entitled inquiries that implied I was an idiot, too.
Oh Jesus, me too! This kid will not accept that he handed in his paper late according to my specifications (i.e., don't slide it under my damn door) and there is a late penalty. So he's off to my chair, which is fine. He's been belligerent in person and snide on e-mail and I am not backing down even if I have to go to the Provost. If tenure isn't for this, I don't know what it's for.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for listening...This has been ultra cathartic, especially seeing as this has been my very first post here.@Wombat: If we could stoop to the lowest form of internet life, I'd love to click the "like" button to your analogy :). @Gary-- my thoughts exactly about retention! @ Cassandra- you're right that grade penalties are appropriate. All involved parties, whether they be guilty or not, will be getting a zero for the paper. This penalty was suggested to me by my immediate supervisor and so I'm sticking with her idea. And, if there was an innocent party, then let s/he step forward and file a grade appeal and stick it to the rest of the crowd. The worst thing about this is that I have a *hunch* who did the work based on the language and style used. He will be getting an F based on his mathematical total. However, the graduate will be "earning" a D since he did do a few other things during the semester than his other peers. Since he's not even bachelor's degree material, it is as likely as monkeys flying that he'd get an advanced degree, but he is going to be charged of plagiarism formally and it would appear on his record (not the transcript, unfortunately). It seems very unfair, but it was made pretty clear to me this week that while I am being supported in name only, I'd be fed to the lions if it got to the highest reviewing party once again. I am beginning to fear for my job every time that I use the handbook that is published and follow policy. Apparently, those are window dressings.
ReplyDeleteThis penalty was suggested to me by my immediate supervisor and so I'm sticking with her idea.
ReplyDeleteGiven the circumstances you describe, this sounds like a perfectly reasonable plan to me.
And if the guy who actually did the work shared it with others, then he's equally guilty (and well as extremely stupid, gullible, and/or being blackmailed), and deserves the same punishment.
Those sounds like pretty poor work conditions. Have you considered other alternatives? (easier said than done, I realize)