My students have been so bad for so long, I've become numb to it. I know they're going to lie. I know they're going to try to scam me. I used to get worked up. I used to wrassle them into shape. Now I just find it all washing over me.
I used to get sick to stomach thinking about how I had to hold the line, stay tough, keep them honest.
Now I find I just grade the papers, assign the homework.
I hate that. My wife tells me I'm different this semester. She says I don't come home and talk about my day as much. I don't tell her about the students, good or bad.
This is not healthy, I don't think. I feel disengaged. I feel like I'm punching the clock.
I have 20 more years of this if my health holds. How am I going to make it?