Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Since We Were Talking About Fucking in the Library. From the Daily Californian.

by Nadia Cho.

I’ve always had the cliched fantasy of having sex in Main Stacks, so we wasted no time in heading there first. The trick to doing it in Stacks is to go at a time when there won’t be a lot of people studying at the same time and to pick a section of books that people won’t ever think to look up. Like the British Royal Academy archives.

We decided that, out of the millions of books in the library, the shelves full of books on religion seemed like the best place to fuck. We moved the adjacent shelves to block our location so that we couldn’t be seen from the rows on either side. I liked having our shelves of choice close to each other so that the setting was nice and cozy.

It’s best to have some empty shelves toward the bottom so that you can climb them and feel like Spider-Man while your partner penetrates you standing up. You can even re-enact the awesome sex scene from the film Atonement. I definitely love a man who can fuck well while standing up.




20 comments:

  1. Oh for God's sake, why don't get a private study carrel?!?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I DON'T CARE about how the students get their jollies. WHAT I DO care about is how I HATE-HATE-HATE how the pages of the Archives of the Royal Academy are ALL STUCK TOGETHER.

      EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Delete
    2. In the library at my alma mater where I spent a lot of time in, the staff had signs plastered all over the place warning us about taking in food. The crumbs tended to attract critters which ate them and, presumably, they would be inspired to start munching on the books.

      The staff later banned cellphones but making whoopee in the stacks wasn't mentioned, though. I'm sure someone thought that since sex wasn't specifically prohibited, it was OK.

      Delete
  2. I am generally against slut shaming but for her I'll make an exception.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Someone in the follow-up article got it right when they wrote that she wasn't a journalist but an exhibitionist.

      Delete
  3. This sounds a lot like some dining-hall conversations I heard during exam period. It wasn't everybody by any means, but it was among the chosen procrastination methods. Publishing it in the newspaper under your own name is, however, new to me.

    All the same, I think she's right that she hasn't done herself any potential professional harm, at least not given that she wants to go into academia and/or psychology. I hope she doesn't end up with a stalker, but, if she does, that's still ultimately the stalker's responsibility, not hers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If I found out anything like this about a job candidate, it would weigh heavily against them, man or woman. Obviously this person is lacking clear boundaries and relishes the attention she gets from her behavior.

      Potential student-fucker. We have enough of those already.

      Delete
    2. I take your point, but she's still in her early twenties, and coming to terms with her sexuality, and sometimes a bit of oversharing (and overexperimenting) is the way people work their way out from under an (unfounded) sense of shame. If she hasn't managed to move from the personal to a somewhat more distanced/nuanced view by the time she's looking for a hands-on (but not *too* hands-on, please) job, I'd be worried.

      Actually, the main thing that surprises me is that she's going through this process toward the end of her college years, which strikes me as more typical of my generation than hers. But we all do things at our own speeds, and I'm not sure she's any more likely to fuck the students than the proffies who wandered around talking about phalluses (phalli?) and Lacan in my day were. Or maybe they were fucking the students, too. I may be naive about these things.

      Delete
    3. Stella, I'm not sure I'd hold it against her (always my favorite play on words) but it would be fun to bring it up in the job interview. You could even play it up by saying, "I'm quite interested in your early writing samples. They bring to mind issues that faculty face on a daily basis. Tell me, as a member of our department, would you continue to fuck in the library or would you do it in your office? Will you require an apparati to be installed for such one-on-one meetings?"

      Delete
  4. Don't a lot of college newspapers have a lithe provocateur like this? Aren't most of them really insecure down deep?

    Whoops.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, I think you're right about the insecurity, and tend to think she'll be more effective if/when she works through it (and annoying and/or toxic if she doesn't, but, for the moment, I'm just a bit sympathetic with the struggle, even if I'm not sure it really belongs in public).

      And I like "lithe" as a typo (I think) here. Presumably one needs to be lithe, in several senses of the word, to successfully have sex between the stacks.

      Delete
  5. I enjoy a bit of exhibition every now and then, as long as I'm at home, the curtains are pulled, and my significant other isn't a colleague.

    That being said, I think this girl goes a bit too far in her escapades. Fucking in a public place and then confessing to it in the campus newspaper are not a very graceful combination. Good luck finding a job girl!

    On the other hand, at SOME colleges, this may maker her more employable.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Replies
    1. Well, she advocated avoiding. . .um. . .fluid production. How, exactly, she didn't say. Assuming her male partner is of similar age, I'd think that would be something of a challenge.

      Delete
  7. I kinda second Bubba's "meh", at least as far as the write-up goes. I don't really mind if someone at a student newspaper wants to write about sex, using themselves as exhibit A. It seems pretty tame by San Fran standards.

    But I do have one objection to our recent focus on sex in the stax. I admit, I didn't read the fine print on my library card before I signed it, but I don't recall consenting to being part of someone else's sexual thrill.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't recall hearing about such incidents in the library while I was a student. The nearest thing to improper behaviour occurred while I was studying for an undergrad exam.

      A group of students in a set of carrels close by had smuggled several bottles of beer in with them and were having a good time guzzling it. It became rather irritating hearing the occasional hiss of a bottle being opened followed by a metallic clinking as the cap hit the floor.

      Delete
  8. I'm tired of reading and critiquing student editorials. I know, they are God awful and/or disgusting. This just strikes me as fish/barrel.

    ReplyDelete