Saturday, September 7, 2013

RYS Flashback. Six Years Ago Today. The Never Completed FAQ.

September 7th, 2007

We Don't Have a FAQ, But If We Did, These Are Entries That Would Likely Appear.

  • Who are the moderators? What are their likes and dislikes? Could I send them some chocolate?
  • Who started RYS? Is he still alive? Is he still bitter? Is he sweaty?
  • Why don't you publish clearer pictures in each post? Why are they sort of arty? Are you nuts? Can't you work Photoshop better than that?
  • What gives you the right to rate students? Isn't that what grades are? Don't you know you're terrible assholes for running this site? Can't you see what damage you're doing to our special little snowflakes?
  • Why don't you organize this site better? Why don't you use tags or labels? Why are your titles always stupid and too long? What right do you have to make fun of posts that you have decided to publish? Do you think that because I didn't proofread that you should probably do it for me? Why can't I find anything?
  • Why are you preoccupied with "breaking the tablet in half"? You use that joke all the time when you think someone is acting as if their medication is not the right dosage? Are you projecting? Are you on some kind of mood elevator? Are you gobbling beta blockers just to keep an even keel? Do you imagine others are, too? Why can't you just mind your own fucking business and break your own tablets in half?
  • How come you don't publish my posts? What kind of censorship is that? Are you afraid of my brilliance, my ferocity, my truth?
  • How does one become a correspondent? Someone once was a "chief" correspondent; is that better? Are those people your favorites? Why don't you like me as much as them? Do they pay you money? Do you owe them something? Why do they think they're so special? Do they put their status on their CVs?
  • How much longer will RYS go on? Isn't it hard to do every day? Isn't it boring to do every day? Don't you get tired of reading the shit that comes in? Why do you use Hotmail for your email account? Do you have something against Yahoo!?


  1. The urge to put my correspondent status on my CV grows with each year, I assure you.

  2. My answer to point 4: Grades are a dispassionate, empirical assessment of a student's work. We rate the whole person, rectum and all, here. It's our chance to do unto others as they do unto us in course evaluations. I only wish we could actually publish student names: Xanthus Pettyviolet: I taught him in one mid-level course; he has a poor work ethic, misses classes, lies like a lying lier in his regular attempts to suck up to his professors, never seems to think he is responsible for anything he does, wears his ballcap backwards and seems to have three aeropostale sweatshirts. An employer would be wise not hire him.

    My answer to the last point: It is hard continuing to go to work and teach lazy, unmotivated, immature students, but it is easy to come home and lay bare their asininity for all to see. As long as there are students, this blog will have a raison d'etre (French, not some misspelling).

  3. RYS was a lot bitchier than CM. I felt much worse about our profession with RYS than I do with CM. And I say that having loooooved RYS. So these flashbacks remind me of how much more I love CM, and how happy I am that Fab saved this group of people from forced retirement and dispersal.

    (applause to Fab and Cal and Leslie, et al)

    1. Seconded.

      The RYS flashbacks seem to be a lot "edgier" (which might be why some people complain about CM b "going downhill"). They also seem (to me) to be more mean-spirited. Here, the tone is exasperated, rueful, baffled...and while Stella beings the smack down, it's not as mean as it could be.

      We are bloodied but unbowed by our trials in higher Ed, and this place helps us feel less alone, and for that I am grateful.