Murphy's Law of Conferences: 1. If there are only two panels on a particular day that you wish to attend, they will be scheduled at the same time. 2. The two panels will be scheduled in rooms as far apart as possible and still be part of the same conference.
3. If you are scheduled to give two presentations at a given conference, they will either be scheduled a) simultaneously, or b) at the very first (i.e., for a week-long conference, Monday Morning) session and the very last (i.e., Friday Afternoon) session. Corollary to rule 3b: the longer the gap between these sessions, the more expensive the hotel, the more boring the intermediate sessions, the more unpleasant the weather, and the fewer interesting things to do in the conference vicinity.
ReplyDeleteFucking MLA bastards. Why didn't they consult you about this beforehand?
ReplyDeleteWhat is this "MLA" of which you speak??
DeleteLast time I presented at a major conference, they had grouped all the geographically related panels in the same presentation slots. I heard some balderdash about concentrating topics to make it easier for people to travel... nothing about how they killed the audiences for all these panels by counter-programing them against their best customers.
ReplyDelete4. You will be scheduled to present at the same time as another panel by way more famous scholars which you yourself would rather attend. 5. You will be scheduled to present at 4:30, long after everyone has decamped for the bar, and present to your fellow panelists in an empty room. But you have that line on your vita. No one can take that away from you.
ReplyDeleteGoing first is the WORST. You don't have any time to build up excitement for your paper -- paper titles are always so boring and you need to be able to schmooze over drinks to get a crowd to come to your panel. At least if you go last you don't have to put any effort into it.
ReplyDeleteAnd the one you choose to attend will be less exciting than the one that you didn't go to.
ReplyDelete