It says on the test form to start writing our answers here. Do you want me to start writing my answer here?
Should I number my answers to match the questions on the test?
It says to draw a diagram. Should we label the parts?
Is this long question the main essay?
Should I follow this direction right here on the test?
Should I label the axes of my graph?
It says to do it this way. Is that the way I should do it?
You asked us to follow a direction. Look, see? I followed it. Okay?
Should I be answering it like this? [As I said earlier, I don't provide feedback during the test.] But I just want to know if my answer should look like this. [As I said earlier, I don't provide feedback during the test.] So you're not going to tell me? [No.]
And finally, after handing in a test:
I am holding the syllabus and looking at it. When are your office hours?
*Only one student whispered; most spoke at a regular, conversational volume. When I asked them to whisper, most looked at me quizzically. I usually had to ask more than once, even though I was demonstrating whispering as I asked.
It says that I can post a comment here. Is this the right place to do that? Am I pressing the correct keys on the keyboard? Is this the button I press to publish my comment?
ReplyDeleteIs what's on this test going to be on the test?
ReplyDeleteWait, are we being tested on this? Is the exam cumulative? Do I have to know my Yaro?
ReplyDeleteYou always have to know your Yaro!
DeleteAnd it's also true that - due to there only being 4 of us - you have to know you're Yaro!
DeleteYES, and it will go ON YOUR PERMANENT RECORD.
Delete(As inwardly, I giggle with malice.)
Who wrote this post? I don't see that information anywhere, nor was there any warning that we might have a post by this person yesterday. This blog is so disorganized!
ReplyDeleteThe poster should of told us the'yre backround so I can understand what there opinion is, because there post is bias.
DeleteI can haz cheezeburger?
ReplyDeleteDeduct five points per idiotic question. That'll put a stop to it.
ReplyDeleteWhich button do I press first, "preview", "sign out" or "publish"? The blue one probably.
Should I put my name on my comment, or is it supposed to be anonymous?
ReplyDeleteYou say it's supposed to be neither anonymous nor signed with our real names, but pseudonymous? What the heck does that mean? Do you have to use such big words? I'm sure we never covered that in class (at least not on the days I attended, and you should review all the material regularly for those who have lives and all, and can't always attend. Or at least post the powerpoints. And a review sheet. And a glossary. The way it's all explained in the textbook is too confusing.)
DeleteJust use a fake name.
DeleteWhose fake name should I use?
DeleteJust invent the name you are going to use, OK?
DeleteBut what if it's the real name of somebody else? How could I be sure someone else hasn't used it before?
DeleteDon't worry about that. Many people have the same name as somebody else.
DeleteBut then how will you know it's me and not one of those somebody elses?
DeleteIt's OK. I'm not supposed to know it's you.
DeleteUSE THIS NAME: Flaky McSnowflake. Don't worry, no one else here or anywhere near here has that name. I'LL KNOW IT'S YOU. Any other questions?
DeleteAt this hour on Friday evening, you all have written the best comment thread.
DeleteI like this plan. If you know it's me, then at least one of us does.
DeleteTeacher Galore, why did you give me only an A minus? That's not faaaiiirrrr!
DeleteI showed my test to Teacher Ben and he said it was the best he ever saw! So I deserve an A PLUS!
Agreed Ben...these comments are great.
Delete1. Interpreting and following the instructions is part of the test. The only question about the test that will be entertained is whether there is a typographical error, which will be answered yes or no.
ReplyDelete2. Interpreting the questions and answer choices is part of the test. The only question about the test that will be entertained is whether there is a typographical error, which will be answered yes or no.
DeleteQ: This here about how you won't answer questions about the test, does that mean like if I'm confused about what a question or answer is saying and if I say it back to you in my own words to see if I understand, then you won't tell me if it's right?
DeleteA: Instructions number one and two contain no typographical errors.
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ReplyDeleteOne thing that puzzles me about this scenario, which strikes me as quite familiar/plausible: why are many members of this generation of students quite willing to be (very) audibly puzzled by a test with clear written instructions, but extremely reluctant to answer when an instructor asks an open-ended question with multiple right answers in an attempt to generate discussion? We're told that they're afraid of embarrassing themselves by giving the wrong answer, but something doesn't add up. Maybe it's something in their attitude learning, and tests, and how learning works, and who's responsible for making sure they "succeed"? Even so, it seems to me that this generation's fear of public embarrassment is being overblown.
ReplyDelete[And yes, I know I'm turning into Frod with all the deletions and corrections. #$%@! middle-aged brain; the words just don't flow reliably into the fingers in the way they used to.]
They also share all kinds of embarrassing stuff on Twitbook etc. It would seem their sense of shame is indeed unequally spread.
DeleteI like the hypothesis that it has something to do with their view of who's supposed to do all the work in their learning. Back in my day, it was OK to put your neck out and be wrong.
CC: Ppppffffffftttthhhhhhhttttttt!
DeleteFa-ab, Frod's making rude noises at me, and I can't concentrate. Make him sto-op!
DeleteProffie, these are easy. The answers are:
ReplyDeleteYes/yes/yes/yes/yes/yes/yes/OK/You'll need to figure that out by using what you've learned in this course, since that's exactly what's being tested here./It should say on the first line.
Teaching general-ed intro astronomy for non-majors who are terrified of science and math has given me plenty of practice in keeping a straight face as I give exactly these answers to exactly these questions, and similar ones.
In the U.S. Navy, they trained us that, when captured, we need only give our name, rank, and service number. This training proved extremely valuable in later life, along with the importance of being at the correct place at the correct time, the value of not leaving my station without being properly relieved, and everything I learned after the navy, when I was lead singer in a rock 'n' roll band.
DeleteFrod, all of those are the right answers! Including the rock 'n' roll band. Want to do a gig sometime with Cal, and may I sing backup?
ReplyDeleteBut I do have a problem keeping a straight face in class. In fact, during a review session last week, I totally lost it and doubled over in hysterics after the fifth really dumb, irrelevant answer in a row. It was the end of a long day at the end of a long week, but still. I was ashamed. I felt like Mary Richards at the funeral of Chuckles the Clown. Fortunately, the students had their own hysterics, watching me be helpless. I did apologize afterwards to the student who set me off. She was gracious about it, or maybe clueless.
An old friend from that era recently found my web page and e-mailed, "Do you still sing 'The Lemon Song'? How about 'Sympathy for the Devil'? I replied, "No, I'm a college professor now. But there are advantages to this. When I can think of one, I'll let you know what it is."
DeleteTo everyone who commented: you are seriously funny and should seek help. I wish I could use OPH's advice.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete[In the middle of an exam]
ReplyDeleteStudent: In this question, is this the correct answer?
Me: I cannot help you answer an exam question.
Student: Oh. Okay, yes, I understand.... so, in this question, is this the correct answer?
Me: [thinking] (what the f--k, man, you just told me you 'understood' my instruction)
[action] (turned around and walked away without uttering a single additional word). Thankfully, nearby students who hear the exchange do what I wanted to do, and stare fixedly at the 1st student like he's a complete idiot, which he is...
When I was at Dartmouth, the undergrads often tried to trick me into answering test questions for them. Many of them subsequently became lawyers, unsurprisingly. I found an effective way to put a stop to it was to say loudly, "DID YOU KNOW THAT TRYING TO TRICK ME INTO GIVING YOU THE ANSWER IS A VIOLATION OF THE HONOR CODE? You're supposed to taking this exam YOURSELF, without outside assistance, and the statement next to your signature SAYS CLEARLY." This may only work at Dartmouth, of course: only there do people mention the honor code without giggling, and they don't have anonymous evaluations of instructors by students.
ReplyDelete