Friday, September 16, 2016

University Title Generator, posted by (but not programmed by) Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

All university administrators with titles that are six or more words long should be subject to a comprehensive review. It's easy to see what a "Professor of Physics" does, since that's only three words. Does anyone know what an "Associate Assistant Executive for Investor Technology" does? Does even the Associate Assistant Executive for Investor Technology know?

For even more such rubbish, see here:

http://universitytitlegenerator.com/



- Froderick Frankenstien from Fresno

11 comments:

  1. College MiserySeptember 16, 2016 at 2:38 AM

    I LOVE THIS LINK!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. EC1September 16, 2016 at 4:27 AM

    Love the link, but some of the salaries are lower than mine, thus it lacks verisimilitude.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Conan the GrammarianSeptember 16, 2016 at 10:32 AM

      Just popping in to let you know that I'm still reading everything and still getting a lot of joy from your comments, friend.

      Delete
    2. Ogre Proctor HepSeptember 16, 2016 at 9:35 PM

      Cool. What's your randomly generated title?

      Delete
    3. Contingent CassandraSeptember 17, 2016 at 11:54 AM

      Hi,Conan! I think he has a title, OPH, it's "the Grammarian." Makes more sense than most of the others mentioned here. Maybe not as clear as "webmaster" (see Patty's comment, below) in terms of describing job duties, but it's a title, or at least an epithet.

      Delete
    4. Ogre Proctor HepSeptember 17, 2016 at 3:28 PM

      My first title randomly generated by the linked page was "Principal Associate Chancellor of Internal Compliance for the Committee on Neighborhood Communications." I forget the salary.

      I clicked the box at the bottom of several more times and didn't get anything involving Grammarian, but I did note that an occasional REAL title would come up, such as President of Auburn U at >$2M and head coach at UCLA for which I made a point of not looking at the salary.

      Delete
  3. UnknownSeptember 16, 2016 at 1:14 PM

    Associate President of the Task Force on Neighborhood Partnerships. Estimated salary: $256,725. Sounds like a fraction of my current job at much higher pay. I'll take it!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Froderick Frankenstien from FresnoSeptember 17, 2016 at 7:38 AM

    One that just popped out was:

    President of Pennsylvania State University

    Estimated salary: $2,906,721

    ReplyDelete
  5. Contingent CassandraSeptember 17, 2016 at 11:51 AM

    Well, there's mine: [Word which means non-tenure-track] Associate Professor. There are actually nontenured Associate Professors at my undergrad institution, because it's one of those places where almost no one gets tenure (the tenured professors are mostly hired away from other institutions), but almost everyone lands on their feet in a tenured position elsewhere after a painful year or two. But almost everywhere else non-tenure-track + Associate = an oxymoron, and it still strikes me as one.

    However, it took me 5 years longer than I originally expected to get to this point, and it does come with a higher minimum salary (which was considerably above the salary I had before promotion), so I'll take it (and pursue the title of NTT Full Professor when that becomes an option). The titles also assuage, just slightly, the feeling of being perpetually being stuck at the kids' table, despite being both middle-aged and mid-career. The latter makes me feel like a bit of a sucker, though.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Allen jeleyOctober 19, 2016 at 5:43 PM

    nice

    ReplyDelete
  7. Allen jeleyOctober 19, 2016 at 5:44 PM

    This generator great helped him when i make a site thanks for share it best terms and conditions generator .

    ReplyDelete

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