Monday, December 20, 2010

Circle Time!

My new idiot proofing measures for Spring are going to include starting class with circle time.  Every day we're going to sit on carpet scraps with juice reviewing the calendar and how to tell time.  Why the fuck isn't the time of the final a mystery for the three weeks leading up to it, but suddenly the office phone is ringing off the hook when you need to be stapling exams instead of fielding bullshit stories about not knowing the exam was 55 minutes sooner than you could possibly be here even if you had Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?  I reminded them every fucking day for the last three weeks.  I got nothing but smiles and nods when I asked for confirmation that nobody had any conflicts.  I don't want to hear this shit now.  And guess what, jerks, it doesn't help your chances of me finding "partial credit" (pity points) when I'm grading this thing in a couple of hours. 

12 comments:

  1. I actually do start and/or end most class sessions by putting the course calendar up on the overhead/projection screen and making sure that we are, as I put it, "oriented in time and space." I don't know when I started doing it regularly, and I admit that, philosophically, I don't think it should be necessary, but it seems to help a bit (though I invariably get at least one question immediately after that I've just answered -- apparently the student was either doing something else while I was talking, or was so focused on waiting for me to stop talking so (s)he could ask the question that (s)he didn't notice I had answered it).

    Of course, there are some days when I pull up the calendar first thing to remind *myself* of what the heck we're supposed to be doing in class that day. When one teaches 4 sections of a course with lots of small moving parts, at least 3 of them on slightly different schedules, such reminders are sometimes necessary.

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  2. Can you imagine these children doing this in positions of responsibility? Like for example failing to meet a major client at the airport, and blaming the client for it? Or similarly messing up scheduling for surgery?

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  3. P.S. Whenever idiot-proofing anything, remember that idiots can be extremely clever.

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  4. OMG: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? Priceless. Hope you have some vodka for that juice.

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  5. I really appreciate your rant Wombat...I have the exact same frustration. I'm trying to figure out how to do the equivalent of Cassandra's idea online, but it would still require that they actually LOOK at the Calendar.

    I've done Calendar quizzes, posted 2 different styles of Calendars, attached the Calendar to an e-mail...nothing eliminates the idiot factor. I started thinking about hiding a phrase or word in the Calendar document they would have to use as a password for their first quiz. But I could just imagine the resulting virtual drool..."I couldn't open the file," I can't spell 'preposterous,' "I added late and didn't know there was a Calendar," "Attachments? I don't read no stinkin' attachments!"

    I'VE GOT IT! A flow chart...off to work on my idiot proof flow chart heeheeheeheeeheehhibideejibideejibideeeee

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  6. @Froderick: Yes, unfortunately, I can imagine that, and, given the be-your-own-patient-advocate advice that was circulating a few years ago, which called for writing "operate on this side" on yourself with a sharpie before going under for any surgery that involved one of two matching parts -- knees, hips, breasts, etc. -- it seems that others can, too. Interestingly, hospitals have now adopted versions of this as standard procedure.

    However, that seems to me to be a solution to a lack-of-attention-to-detail problem, whereas I suspect that the phenomenon Wombat describes is more of a lack-of-attention-to-the-big-picture problem. I spend time just before the semester creating detailed calendars, and entering reminders into various electronic devices, because I know I'll be overwhelmed by the middle-end of the semester. Many of my students do the same, but a significant number seem to neglect such planning ahead, and continue on autopilot until they bump up against something along the lines of an unexpectedly empty classroom. This results in office-hour exchanges like the one I had a week or so ago, regarding when a student might be on campus and available for a follow-up meeting:

    Student: "Well, on Monday, I have your class, then Intro Basketweaving 101, then Advanced Raffia Identification 303."

    Me: "I don't know about the other two classes, but our class isn't meeting on Monday. Monday is a reading day; we've already had our last class."

    Student: "Oh."

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  7. @Prof & C: I'm still an online-only newbie, but I've actually had a bit *more* luck getting them to pay attention to, if not the calendar, then something calendar-like, in online courses, where I post a less-detailed full-semester calendar, plus a series of Blackboard "learning modules" which are really just lists of "things to do this week." Some of them still go straight to the Discussion Board, where most course activities take place, but I've found it helps a bit to do things like *not* include full information about the reading on which they're supposed to comment in the Discussion post prompt, but instead refer them back to the module, which has an item along the lines of "retrieve and read x" that precedes "complete Discussion Post x."

    But, yes, overly zealous attempts at idiot-proofing generally just transform the professor into a gibbering idiot him/herself, without affecting the behavior of the pre-existing idiots in the least.

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  8. On my syllabus there is a note called "Contacting the Instructor." It notes that in addition to my school email, I have another email address that they can use in emergencies. Oddly enough, no one uses it, even in emergencies. (I have this policy b/c my school email uses a crappy Microsoft Office interface.)

    Funny, that, I WAS SO DESPERATE I DIDN'T BOTHER TO READ THE SYLLABUS.

    On the other hand, this semester brought a minor victory in this regard...I had an end-of-term handout that I went over in class. One of my Bright and Shining Stars (read: spoiled little girl) came late, listened to the end of the review of the handout, and then listened to one of her classmates ask a question about the handout that was covered AT THE BEGINNING.

    I answered it.

    Shining Star raised her hand and asked it again.

    One of my student-athletes, not much given to class participation, leaned over the chair next to her and said "Yo, Miz D answered that like twice already."

    I was thrilled.

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  9. @CCassandra

    Thanks for the input. I actually use Learning Modules too, but as you said they can bypass these and go directly to the Assessments area or Discussion Area.

    Once I got the bright idea to eliminate the Assessments icon so they HAD to go through the L.M. to get to the quiz. Figured this would help them see the Study Guides and Power Points. DON'T DO THAT! They just assumed there were no quizzes because there wasn't an icon. Doh!

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  10. @P&F: thanks for the warning. I've been tempted to take similar measures to channel them through a single entry point (very difficult given Bb's "something new here" icons), but have suspected that they would, indeed, just ignore anything that wasn't flashing "new! new! new!" at them. Heck, one reason I can't get them to read my calendar is that it's a file on the home page, not Bb's calendar tool.

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  11. Could the moderatorix please make this image bigger. It almost crashed my iPhone. But not quite.

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