Thursday, June 23, 2011

Predictable Epiphanies

Dear Professor Stressor,

I've been at this school for four long years and have never even considered taking one of your courses or any others in your discipline. But now that I need to take my very last option so I can graduate, I suddenly realize how unbelievably interesting, worthwhile, and important your summer course is. Please leapfrog me into this full course ahead of all the students on the wait list. Also, if you could help me find a way to get notes so I don't have to attend class all the time
I got other stuff going onthat would be great. Thanks.

Nate Dunderpate


  1. My response: What is your address, I need to talk to you personally.

    *Nate Dunderplate wakes up in Siberia, his last memory being six men in odd uniforms jumping him while the prof nonchalantly smoked a nasty-looking cigarette*

  2. I think Captain Subtext has been busy here.

    What a pleasure it must have been to tell young Nate to go take care of all that other stuff he's got going on.

  3. I receive this one a regular basis, except that, besides explaining their sudden interest in my class, the authors have to explain (a) why they didn't take the class 3 semesters ago, when they were supposed to, and (b) why any of the numerous still-open sections of the course won't do. They always seem very surprised that none of the supposedly "special" circumstances they cite in fact distinguish them from other people on the wait list.


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