Facing that huge stack of essays, I wonder if I shouldn't rethink how I begin my comments to counter what most of my students apparently have been told their entire lives.
I might begin with "Although the essay clearly shows your amazing talent and fierceness and along the way shows sparkle-standing that can only come from daring to dream big, to improve your writing you need to address. . . .
- TubaPlayingProf
...your writing.
ReplyDeleteI just googled the statement in the picture. Fuckin' A. People, at least, Pinerest users, actually say shit like that. God help us.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading the line "stand in your sparkle!" I'm now standing in a puddle of my own vomit.
ReplyDeleteA friend was just telling me about their 6-page assignment rubric. Why not just write students' papers for them? My first papers really aren't that bad this semester (though I am curious about the number of papers that have the same "created" and "last modified" date and time under Properties in Word), but I am dreading the second set, which come in tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteAn interesting detail. I never thought to check that parameter. Apparently you have some very fast writers in your class.
DeleteCould they be writing papers on their phones or some other devices, then cutting and pasting? I don't want to assume these are paper mill cut-and-pastes...
DeleteI'm tempted to leave OPH's answer there, all by itself, because it's perfect.
ReplyDeleteBut I'll spoil its isolated glory by adding my own thought: same shit sandwich, fancier bread (and who really cares what kind of bread a shit sandwich is on?)
Oops. Should have reloaded.
DeleteI deliberately didn't comment because of the perfection of OPH's response.
DeleteBut what I wanted to mention was that whatever it is my students are standing in, it's not sparkle. In fact, "spackle" would be an awful lot more like it.
Well, after reviewing final team papers that built upon prior drafts with comments and finding in my last such one NO changes, no consideration for the problem of converting first person singular to plural, or, god help us, whatEVER APA means to citation and reference...I can say that standing in your own sparkle is occasionally equivalent to being in deep, deep....sparkle.
ReplyDeleteI suppose this is supposed to be inspirational. To energize the reader and bolster their spirits in the face of the draining suction of day-to-day obligations and hurdles.
ReplyDeleteBut, seriously? Stand in your sparkle?
From my point of view https://xkcd.com/896/ (That's the (zombie) Marie Curie comic, BTW) is a heck of a lot more inspirational than that guff. The message may be partly subtextual, but it hints at the effort that will be required.
My fear is that these inspirational platitudes are being taken as a substitute for serious effort, when they are best used as an adjuvant.
DeleteThis time of the semester I grade by sense of smell. Read, slap on a number, done. If the little rats haven't learned from my comments at this point, ain't gonna happen. Adios, lugnutz.
ReplyDeleteStand in your sparkle. Perfect.
ReplyDelete