Starting in the Spring, I add the ever popular "e-mails will be read Mon-Fri 9-5" comment to my syllabus. First of all, I do not make "study guides" or "test outlines" (that is new terminology. I never heard it put that way before, but this semester they won't stop asking for "the test outline"). Secondly, I was hoping that the more than half empty class since midterms meant that my midterm was a reality check and all the deadwood dropped. But no, everone who has been MIA is e-mailing me for "the test outline". Lastly, the test is in 20 hours. If you want to cut and hope that somehow you can do better than you did when you were coming, fine, but at least give yourself a shot. At least ask for the "test outline" by, I don't know, Thursday afternoon, or Friday morning maybe? How are you even going to send me your pathetic follow up questions if you don't even ask the first question until Sunday afternoon?
Fuck all of you, I can't wait to watch you cry, blot your tears with my test, and then leave to spend the rest of the day in your pajamas in the student center cutting classes that aren't giving tests, and sending "can I have the test outline" messages with your fucking blackberries to my colleagues in other departments. You're all delusional, conceited, immature assholes and I can't fucking wait for you to take the mother fucking MCATs.
Now, where did I save this test, I just thought of some fun questions to add...
I confess I once
ReplyDeleteflipped out and
made a very bad
test outline.
It was fantastically easy,
not at all what was scheduled.
Students loved it. They had confidence.
They still dropped like flies.
When the next test came,
they did not ask again.
I make a point now of filling exams with stuff I know the students haven't bothered to read or study. It may be petty of me but it's required reading and studying and I tell them it may be on the exam. If that's too difficult for them to understand, then I am allowed this small revenge. The good, attentive students win and the others? They get what they deserve.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Never ever look at work email on the weekend. Your soul is not up for sale.
ReplyDeleteWTF is a test outline? How is that not the test before the test?
ReplyDeleteYeah, like Blackdog said! Test outline?
ReplyDeleteMy idea of a test outline is: "we are going to have a test on Chapters 8, 9, 10, and 11 (and anything before it is fair game, too)."
Last week, I had a student who wanted me to consider creating worksheets for the OPEN book test that's coming this week. The material isn't tricky (and I don't make trick questions); it's just hard, even with the book open!
I decided to give my online students a study guide for their *open-book* tests because I was sick of dealing with their whining and pitiful test scores. And because I'm an adjunct, so of course if I don't keep them happy I get in trouble.
ReplyDeleteThe test is 50 multiple-choice questions, and the study guide gives you a list, in order, of which term you need to answer each question. In other words: the study guide is an answer sheet.
The average test grade for this open-book test accompanied by the answers? About 70%. My evals always include comments such as "the study guide was not helpful."
I would be tempted to give out a copy of a syllabus as a "study guide" or a "test outline" when asked. Most of them don't read it in the first place, so they might not even realise it's not newly created...
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone know of any data or actual scientific studies that show a correlation between study guides/test outlines and improved grades? I once got reamed for not giving out my Lecture Notes. And I said, "Show me the studies that prove giving out my lecture notes improves a poor student's grades and I will." Shut hir up. I'm sure there is some weasly-ass study that shows this because there's a study that can prove anything. But my personal experience of 20+ years is that doing all this doesn't dramatically change my grade spread. This is more a "feel good" policy.
ReplyDeleteI do Study Guides and Review sheets, and I've even done practice exams. My goal was always to help the student, but doing all this stuff doesn't matter to the student who can't read the syllabus or calendar or who is just going to cram or procrastinate anyway. It helps the good student feel more secure and occasionally helps the good student that was absent for a legit reason. But the "D" student isn't going to get a "B" because my friggin' Review Sheet was fantabulous. This is an urban legend akin to group work.
What do you call the "D" student who got a "B" in group work? My friggin' partner.
I want my students to succeed, and if it means showing them a sample of what's coming, I'm all for it. My students are not great; I admit it. And they come from a culture of testing, so I make a sample test so they get a dry run of the style and nature of the test.
ReplyDeleteI've taken to telling students in advance that 3 of the following 5 questions will appear on the test. If they study all five, they get a decent review of the entire subject. Of course most of them will roll the dice, but they would anyway.
ReplyDeleteI take an approach of making a small practice example - for a multiple choice midterm or exam of, let's say, 50 questions, I make up 5 to 10 questions that won't be on the exam but which are of the same format and difficulty as what they'll encounter. For some reason this extra 5-10 minutes of work on my part placates the masses even though I don't think it does them any good, but if it'll make them shut up and leave me alone I'm happy to do it.
ReplyDeleteI do practice exams and review sessions too ... with like but not identical questions. It does kind of shut the masses up. But this was a long, hard fall from when I began, when I said, "What will be on the test is in the readings and your lecture notes." It never occurred to me that it could be otherwise.
ReplyDelete