Friday, January 21, 2011

TMI

Why do students think we want to know the intimate details of their lives?? This week I've had two students who decided to overshare...

Student 1, Sick Sara, sent me an email today explaining why she missed class (spelling errors & run on sentences hers).

Ms. CommProf I missed class today because i went to the bathroom before my class before you class and realized that i started my period and i dint have any other clothes to wear to change into so i had to go home and i have a sinus infrection too so i really dint feel good so i went home i;m sorry i missed class but i wanted to let you know i promise i will be in class monday -sara

I haven't responded yet, but plan to include a short paragraph on what is and isn't appropriate to share. Because I really didn't need to know the details. A quick "I was sick and couldn't make it to class" would have sufficed.

Student 2, Surgery Sam, decided that he needed to show me the scars from the surgery that made him miss the first week of class. One was in a fine place to share (arm) but the other wasn't something I would show to a person I'd known for a week...

Ick.

10 comments:

  1. I once had a student tell me that she would be missing class because she was pregnant but "the doctors found something wrong with the baby," and thus she had an abortion scheduled but it would be performed at the same time that our class meets.

    Those of you who migrated over to CM from RYS may also remember my student with "the cervix excuse."

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  2. But they're all starring in their own reality show!

    How could you keep up if you don't know all the details of everything the star of the show does?

    Don't you have TV at your house?

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  3. You mean you don't want to know all those details? I make it a point to get to know my students. I routinely start class by asking questions:

    - What color is your underwear?
    - Do you use contraceptives?
    - Do you insist that I shower first?
    - Are those tits real?
    - Are there any positions you want to rule out from the beginning?
    - Have you been tested?

    I find this clears the air and brings us all onto the same page. It fosters an open and honest learning environment.

    My teaching style is generally frontal, but I also make sure to come at some questions from behind as well, for variety and interest. I make sure to get interaction going early. It is definitely a give-and-take situation. I might be the "content expert," but whether it be an oral presentation, a hands-on activity or a teacher-student exchange, we're all learning from each other. Some of them don't open up to me right away, but when I have demonstrated the teaching tools at my disposal and given them my first quick slide show, they loosen up.

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  4. @ AS: you've missed your calling, my friend. Get thee to whatever local comedy venue you can find and force them to give you the mike.

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  5. AS, that was great.

    I generally have s weak spot for anything closely related to "female problems." I occasionally suffer from nosebleeds in dry weather so I can't imagine what you womenfolk go through. Use a calendar, see a gynocologist, whatever. Just don't miss too many days of lab, OK?

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  6. @ Beaker Ben -- you've actually touched upon one of the reasons that I've extremely lenient re: documentation of absences. If a women actually does have a 'female problem', she may face the choice between being coerced into medical sexual assault (aka, an 'examination') or losing marks for her non-attendance. I could never have it on my conscience that a student might feel the need to choose the former to avoid the latter.

    As long as students tell me they were unwell (and I don't ask for all these details, I just get them sometimes), I will take them at their word. Life's real problems come in all varieties, and are not any less valid to me because they may not be documentable.

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  7. I used to hand out student surveys like this, to get to know my students, but I stopped. Reading them was too depressing. Just about all of them, in the section, "What do you want to learn in this course?" just wrote: "I'm only taking this course because it's required."

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  8. I call bullshit on the "female problems" issue. As a woman who for years suffered from and battled prolonged, severe, misdiagnosed "female problems"--while still managing to hold down several jobs including teaching, because there was no pay for days off--I am skeptical of women who complain of such things.

    Where I teach, in every class there are half a dozen students going through physical and mental issues that other people simply never encounter, and they do so without saying a word. Sometimes I never know what they're going through, but experience teaches me that they are in my classes. They soldier on because they have to, because they're grownups, even if some of them are young grownups. They're trying to deal. They may occasionally miss class, but they never make excuses. If these folks have real medical documentation, they only use it when they've missed a significant amount of time, like when they've been hospitalized.

    I know that everyone has different coping mechanisms, but I'm with Chloe CommProf. I don't need to know. Keep it to yourself. The revelation of such TMI is often a tool for manipulation; they do this in all aspects of their lives, not just in the classroom with their profs. And Sawyer's right: They're starring in their own shows.

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  9. A gynecological exam is "medical sexual assault" now? This is the kinda stuff that inspires people to make fun of proffies, you know.

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  10. Kenny: It is if it's enforced. Trust those of us who know something about this, okay?

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