An Academic Hit Man Brings More Bad News
By DWIGHT GARNER
for the NY TIMES
IN THE BASEMENT OF THE IVORY TOWER
Confessions of an Accidental Academic
By Professor X
258 pages. Viking. $25.95.
This book began its life as a fizzy essay, published in The Atlantic Monthly in 2008, that contained at its core, like a radioactive pellet, a seemingly uncontroversial argument: Not every American kid is cut out for college.
The author, a poorly paid adjunct professor, a man who teaches nighttime literature classes in both a small private college and in a community college, wrote under the pseudonym Professor X. This made him seem intrepid and swashbuckling, as if he might secretly be Julian Assange or Banksy.
He is a bit wicked, this Professor X. His book-length expansion of the article, “In the Basement of the Ivory Tower,” is rippled with mellow sarcasm. Reading one student’s terrible paper about Sylvia Plath, he says: “I pictured her writing it in a bar, or while driving to class or skydiving. Maybe she composed it as one long text message to herself.”
Watching his working-class students eat chicken and rice out of plastic foam containers while he’s lecturing, he deadpans: “I feel like Robert Goulet doing dinner theater.”
The tone of his essay, and of this impertinent book, however, is as plaintive as it is lemony. The author is delivering unhappy news, and he knows it. It’s as if he’s proposing to paste an asterisk on the American dream. “Telling someone that college is not right for him seems harsh and classist, vaguely Dickensian,” Professor X writes, “as though we were sentencing him to a life in the coal mines.”
Yet why is it so important to Barack Obama (a champion of community colleges) and those doing America’s hiring, he asks, that “our bank tellers be college educated, and our medical billing techs, our county tax clerks”? College — even community college — drives many young people into debt. Many others lack rudimentary study skills or any scholarly inclination. They want to get on with their lives, not be forced to analyze the meter in “King Lear” in night school in order to become a cop or a nurse’s aide.
“No one is thinking about the larger implications, or even the morality,” Professor X says, “of admitting so many students to classes they cannot possibly pass.”
In marshaling his persuasive arguments, Professor X draws on the work of scholars and sociologists and demographers, and clearly he’s picking up on sentiments floating in the air. Matthew B. Crawford’s best-selling book “Shop Class as Soulcraft,” published in 2009, was an ode to vocational training and dignified blue-collar work.
Yet many reacted angrily to Professor X’s article (he prints some of the nastier letters he received here) as if he were proposing — to paraphrase Paul Fussell in his book “Class” — the beating to death of baby whales using the dead bodies of baby seals.
Professor X is unruffled. One thing adjunct professors are good at, he notes, is delivering bad news.
“We may look mild-mannered, we adjunct professors, in our eyeglasses and our corduroy jackets, our bald heads and trimmed beards,” he declares, in his calmly invigorating style, “but we are nothing less than academic hit men. We are paid by the college to perform the dirty work that no one else wants to do, the wrenching, draining, sorrowful business of teaching and failing the unprepared who often don’t even know they are unprepared.
....and Osama bin Laden is dead.
ReplyDeleteSeriously.
He's dead and we killed him.
Back to Professor X.... everything he wrote is gospel truth; college is a bad fit for many of the people in it, and we are actually devaluing the institution by forcing the majority to go.* As a nation we need to rationally address higher education, the costs, benefits and risks nad come up with a better solution for the masses who are not college material.
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* AND EVERYBODY AT COLLEGE MISERY KNOWS THIS BECAUSE THEY LIVE IT.
Should be "and", not "nad."
ReplyDeleteFurther all caps: ...MOST OF THE YEAR.
I never thought of myself as anything akin to Anton Chigurh. But there are some quotes of his that ring true, and which I have, in some form, delivered myself. Though not to people I have been about to kill. Unless we're speaking metaphorically.
ReplyDeleteAnd you know what's going to happen now. You should admit your situation. There would be more dignity in it.
Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?
"I am going to deliver bad news to many of you." Perhaps I should start class that way.
ReplyDeleteI am pleased that the US, for all its hubris, observed the Muslim tradition of interring a corpse within 24 hours of death. Now, no one is talking about that on the radio (NPR obviously) but it struck me as a good thing. I don't know how Muslims feel about water burials, but at least they got the 24 hours thing right.
On the other hand? If many Americans knew about the 24-hour rule? They'd probably want the body displayed at Ground Zero for a few days so that people could abuse it, ala Mussolini in Italy.
What Prof X misses, I think, is that there are students in EVERY school that flat out don't belong there. There are rich kids in Ivories that freaking don't belong, that are ice cream puff snowflakes extreme, and that have no business trying to earn the degrees that they are trying to earn. Why? The same damn reason that some community college students are struggling--somebody told them they HAD to go to college. Had to.
ReplyDeleteOf course, there are many of us that would rather work with the disadvantaged students that want to learn than the advantaged ones that don't give a crap, and I suppose those are the ones that get angry at Prof X. I've seen plenty in my six years here that would never have found out that they are smart if they hadn't "had" to go to school to get that degree to be a cop, and then they wouldn't have decided to go beyond that basic degree as well.
I think we need to carefully preserve the opportunity for people who want to go to college to go there, regardless of their class status, but find some way to keep those who don't want to go out. Cripes.
@ BlackDog
ReplyDeleteWater burials for Muslims supposedly can only happen under extreme circumstances (i.e. dying on board ship far from port); the US government was afraid any normal grave would become a shrine.
Personally, I wanted to see him tried and the truth brought to light. Was there really an Al-Qa'ida organization before 2001, or was he just funding various small groups of terrorists? Were the 9/11 hijackers really part of Egyptian Islamic Jihad, or some other group, or were they truly AQ? Now that he is dead the cruddy Bush-Obama narrative* has no challenge and that some of the opponents of the Arab Spring (Qazzafi of Libya, Asad of Syria, Saleh of Yemen) may chose to kill themselves rather than surrender and be tried once their governments collapse. Despite all my "grind the idiot students into dogfood" ranting, I do believe in the law and I want these clowns tried, including our own rogues gallery (Yoo, Ashcroft, Rumsfeld, Gonzalez, the various CIA chiefs, Pearl, Cheney, Bush, the heads of the foreign intelligence agencies which allowed the black sites, the commanders of Guantanamo, and many of the bloggers and commentators who excused the "War on Terror" from the outset, including members of the "pro war left.") It must be so, for we became a criminal conspiracy to catch a criminal conspiracy; we cannot let the criminals become pensioners as in West Germany in the 1980s.
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* By continuing the Afghan war and expanding it into the "tribal areas" of Pakistan via drone attacks President Obama has pulled a Nixon. I know he tried to close the prison at Guantanamo, closed the black sites, and got the "combat troops" out of Iraq....the problem is that since WWII after every "sucessful" war we leave behind a base and it stays manned by US personnel and the Iraq-Afghan wars are no exception. When do the soldiers ever leave?
Hear, hear, Strel. I don't care if it's off-topic; I'm so depressed by this outcome and Obama that I just want to sink into a pile of student papers.
ReplyDeleteYes. A trial would have been much better. A "oh, he's dead and in the ocean" seems deeply problematic.
ReplyDeleteLast night our students burned Bin Laden in effigy here at Humpshack. So far there has been no official reaction. Of course, if we were watching people in another country burn OUR leader in effigy? We'd call them savages.
It would have been nice to get him alive, but capturing him alive was apparently not an option, as apparently there was a firefight and he used his own young wife as a human shield. My guess is that he was given an opportunity to surrender, and chose not to. I can't say that if I were Bin Laden, I'd have chosen differently. The rest of his life would not have been pleasant, certainly not as pleasant as living in a mansion, and he would have ended up being executed anyway. It's Hitler's choice, and if you're a terrorist holed up evading justice, it's a logical one when justice finally bangs down your door.
ReplyDeleteI really have no problem celebrating the death of Bin Laden. Maybe that has to do with my personal circumstances and that of my family, but 9/11 literally hit home for me. I'm not the "burning in effigy" kind of gal (also, he's dead, so it's kinda pointless), but I understand it, and I'm very glad he's dead. Had I been in New York I would have taken to the streets myself, singing "God Bless America" and cheering.
Bullet to the head sounds fine to me, if he didn't surrender peacefully. It was happy news.
@StellaFromSparksburg
ReplyDeleteShoot him, gas him, burn him alive with a flamethrower....BUT ONLY AFTER WE TRY HIM. As I wrote before, I want(ed) certain questions answered and he was the best source for that information. I have read that he shot it out, used his wife as a human shield, and that the SEALS were not there to capture/kill himat last resort, but only to assasinate him. Things like this beg questions and create a space for the conspiracy theories to emerge.
Trying him would have been great. I think considering the situation it was not in the cards, and that the lion's share of that is due to Bin Laden himself, who doubtless was not going to allow himself to be taken. Getting him, and getting him alive, are two entirely different things, and I don't think considering the situation that getting him alive was at all a possibility unless Bin Laden himself wished to allow it. And if all they wanted to do was kill him, they could have bombed the entire complex to smithareens, and then gone in. Less risk of American lives being lost.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather have ten thousand conspiracy theorists screaming that he isn't dead, than one funeral for a SEAL. Conspiracy theorists will always emerge, no matter how much proof is provided. The birthers have proven that.
I call HYPOCRICY
ReplyDeletehonest_prof, did you notice that nobody insulted anybody in this discussion? The problem is not thread-hijacking. The problem, with you, is that you constantly and gratuitously insult other people and this page. I thought you were banned anyway for using multiple monikers. But if you aren't, and you have something to say about Bin Laden, contribute away. During your temporary period of decency, we were all glad to hear from you.
ReplyDeleteYou needed a trial.... to find out if Al Qaeda existed before 2001?
ReplyDeleteLet me be clear, I am not saying a trial wouldn't have been good, but THAT is the information you think we'd have gotten from it?
He may have had answers, but a) that's not one anyone shouldn't already know at this point and b) any answers he had that we don't already know were going to the grave with him anyway.
What do you really think he'd have said? "Ok, guys, fair enough, you got me, where do you want to start? Oh, and just so you know I'm not lying, let me place my hand on that magic truth telling book you use in court... Yes, yes, CNN, Bush, Obama, they've all been lying to you. Al Qaeda sprung up over night in 2001. In fact, it only took about a week to plan 9/11. We were watching King Kong and having a couple of beers when my 714th grandson said 'holy shit, that's where we went wrong in '93! We were trying to take down a sky scraper with a van? We should have used planes!!!' and after we got done beating ourselves for not thinking of it sooner we went on travelocity and booked the tickets and stopped off at Lowes for the box cutters."
But back to Professor X: What the hell with " When he talks about teaching writing, he likes to use the word “craft” as a verb. That’s a flogging offense, professor. "? I think that's an annoying phrase too, but why is using a verb as a verb a "flogging offense"?
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ReplyDeleteIn defense of Schmitty -- his misspelling was making fun of our least favorite troll, not referring to Stella's post.
ReplyDeleteI would have been much happier if the official line was this: "In our country, we believe in a trial by jury. Our greatest hope was to apprehend Bin Laden and see him prosecuted for war crimes in an international tribunal, alongside of those Americans who committed them during the same era. Because we could not apprehend him alive, we were forced to assassinate him. That is not justice. But it is what we had to do." I suppose it would have been a lie, but it would have been better than all the smug gloating.
Meanwhile, back to the topic: if we still had actual trades people could enter in this country, trade schools would make sense. As it is, where are the non-collegiate supposed to go? Into the military?
Froggy, the world still needs electricians and HVAC professionals, and mechanics and tilers and carpenters and, dear god, we desperately need ethical contractors (Watch a show called Homes on Homes to see why).
ReplyDeleteI am positive many of my students would be much happier doing any of those things than they are pushing papers in an office or writing a clear memo. God knows I wish I had gone that route. I'd have a house and no debt by now.
@Wombat of the Copier
ReplyDeleteYes....there is a documentary called "The Power of Nightmares" by Adam Curtis made back in 2004. Deep in it, Curtis casts a very skeptical glance at Al Qa'ida and from the information he could gather he makes a case that "The Base" didn't actually exist as a solid organization; it was just a series of terror projects with bin Laden as the funder/religious leader. In fact, that might be how the "organization" is run today. We don't know because WE KILLED THE ONLY GUY WHO COULD GIVE US THE TRUTH AND HE WAS (allegedly) UNARMED WHEN WE SHOT HIM TO DEATH. Seriously, getting this information would've given us greater insight into Al Qa'ida and driven home that Osama bin Laden was a criminal sleaze and not a holy warrior on the level of Saladin.
@ The_Myth
I second what you wrote; living in an earthquake prone area I've seen insanely sloppy contracting mainly because these slobs will have to rebuild the "little boxes of ticky-tacky" after the Big One hits.
A trial would have been good for our image because it would have given a slightly better appearance of dotting our i's. It wouldn't have actually answered any questions because no matter what he said, he'd have been found guilty, and no matter what he said, people would continue to believe whatever they believed before the trial.
ReplyDeleteI'm not arguing about what he did or didn't know that only he would or wouldn't know. I'm not arguing about how valuable knowing it would be. I'm arguing that we wouldn't have gotten it by going through the motions of a trial. The trial would have just made us look better to the rest of the world.