Dear Charlotte,
I have just finished reading your very nice essay on Interdisciplinary Underwater Basket-Weaving. Although it was very well-organized and made some interesting points, it was also easily recognizable as the product of this website: eCheat.com. This is considered plagiarism, a form of cheating, and you have received a zero for your grade. Please email me regarding this issue so we can move forward and ensure your success in my course.
Best,
Academic Monkey
[please note the sarcasm. two weeks pass]
Mrs Monkey [!!], I don't want to give you any excuses for what happened and I'll accept the grade you gave me because you're the professor and I know it's your job to do what you think is best, but I just wanted to tell you what happened. I was out of town and I knew I was running out of time to submit my work, so I called my daughter and had her submit my essay for me. Obviously she submitted the wrong essay. I had downloaded that other essay as an example to inspire me. I know there is nothing I can do about this now, but I just wanted you to know that I wasn't trying any disrespect.
[six minutes after she sent this email, I respond]
Dear Charlotte,
It seems you have a complete essay ready to go, then, one that presumably reflects the assigned reading and engages with the question in your own words. If you submit that completed essay right now, I'll forget about your daughter's mistake. You would need to submit it to me today, however. How fortunate this is easily fixible!
I would advise you to remember that you are graded on the course material and your own ideas and therefore using inspirational essays is not a good idea, even when you don't accidentally submit them as homework.
All the best,
Academic Monkey
****
Two days later, I receive a hastily cut version of the initial plagiarized essay. Hilarious. Charlotte, you are so damn cute. Let me revel in your zero.
Is there a reason you can only give her a zero on the assignment? That's the same grade she would have gotten if she hadn't done the assignment. If you have the academic freedom, you should fail her for the course.
ReplyDeleteBecause, of course, lying is certainly not "trying any disrespect."
ReplyDeleteCan you report students for plagiarism too? I think it's important to get a file on these guys so they can't try to dupe yet another proffie.
I love how she uses her daughter as a scapegoat. I've had a few students blame their parents for something, but haven't seen this turnabout yet myself.
ReplyDeleteIf your school has a reasonably efficient honor process, I, too, would say it's worth reporting the second paper. If it's likely to result in her telling some other story and their believing her, however, don't bother.
Most of my older-than-traditional-age students are wonderful (sometimes wonderful and wonderfully successful, sometimes just responsible despite being pretty overwhelmed, which is wonderful enough for me -- but not, of course, grounds for an A). But every once in a while I get one like this, who seems to have gone through life not coping very well and not learning much, other than how to concoct excuses, along the way. And when students are old enough to have kids who can submit essays for them, it's hard to hold out hope that growing maturity will take care of at least some of their problems. I'm all for opportunities and second chances, but sometimes one wants to recommend that extensive psychological counseling precede attempts at college.
To paraphrase Jon Stewart, you just can't make this sh*t up.
ReplyDeleteI had one of these students recently, minus the plagiarized assignment. When I returned essays, there was none for student X to pick up. Student X insisted that the essay had been emailed to me, yet could locate no email of acknowledgment from me. Student X was nevertheless given the opportunity to email the paper to me immediately. Student X then insisted that the paper had been deleted along with other 'unimportant files'.
ReplyDeleteCouldbebetter, isn't it odd how often that happens?
ReplyDeleteI think it's sweet that you guys talk about plagiarism and online schools as though it's real scholarship though. My hands are tied, my Deans look the other way, and when I try to tell them that one student has plagiarized 5 times they just respond that it's a part of "military culture."
I can only penalize them with a zero. And with the knowledge that no one will ever accept their degree as anything real. Well, mostly no one.
(Which leads me to the whole "why do un-accredited universities even exist" conversation, but that's another series of posts entirely)
Plagiarism "is part of the military culture"? Has anybody notified West Point, Annapolis, et al.? I'm just guessing here, but I suspect they might see things differently.
ReplyDeleteI love the "how fortunate!" part of the response. I've done that to students many times, too. "Oh no," they'll say, "I wrote my paper but it didn't print properly!" No worries, I respond--as soon as class is over, please go back to your computer and e-mail it to me, and I'll accept it without penalty.
ReplyDeleteNinety percent of the time, I hear nothing from the student for a few days. The other ten percent, the student is telling the truth, and I get the paper immediately.
They never expect to be called out on their shit, do they?
Twist the knife. Notify her that you are convening a meeting of all involved, including her daughter. A zero for the assignment is fine. Promoting family discord is gravy.
ReplyDeleteWe're only allowed to give a zero, too, so a plagiarist can still pass the class. It makes me furious.
ReplyDeleteI have a requirement that students bring their class notes, paper, a calculator, and a pen or pencil with them whenever they come to my office for help. I always ask to see these items and they usually don't have all of them. When I send them away to retrieve notes (the item usually missing), those who didn't take notes, and there are many, never return. Cowardice abounds in snowflake land.
ReplyDeleteIn my social science version of h-p's technique, I ask for class notes, a pen, and paper. Then I ask to SEE their class notes. One student told me that it was "none of my business." I pointed out that on the syllabus, it CLEARLY states that when you come to my office hours, I will ask you for these things.
ReplyDeleteYah. She had some really nice...I lie. She had some very amateur drawings of me. I am fat, apparently. And I talk with my hands a lot.
That was awkward for both of us, although she really looked like she wanted to crawl into a hole and die and that made me feel better. Petty, perhaps, but better.
Yup, I too am only allowed to give a zero for the assignment. I used to report the academic dishonesty to the appropriate dean, but after a while she asked me why the F*@# I kept annoying her with trivial e-mails about plagiarism.
ReplyDeleteBlackdog, that is a wonderful tale. Something tells me that she learned a life lesson that day.
ReplyDeleteSurly, I had a similar experience. One day after I noticed my fifth offense plagiarist was getting off scot-free, I emailed the Dean directly and confessed how powerless I feel giving students passing grades when they have cheated. I pointed out that if they did that in real life they would be penalized and that we are not doing them a service by just waiving them by. Two weeks passed. Finally I got a lengthy response about how this is a huge problem and they are overwhelmed by the amount of plagiarism going on.
I suggested we start sending out a stern letter from the Dean. And he does now, which is nice and puts a bit of fear into the students. But I still have to give them second chances if I report them, so I just don't report them. I give them the zero and move on.
The grade penalty for plagiarizing needs to be at least twice that for not doing the assignment at all (in other words, if the assignment is worth 10% of the grade, the student has a zero averaged in as 20% of the grade). That's what I proposed to our sub-Dean in charge of such things when two students plagiarized on one section of a multi-section take-home intro lit exam (the multiple sections made the calculation easy). They both passed, but with grades a full grade lower than they were heading for before the exam. I could live with that.
ReplyDeleteIn my comp classes, they nearly always plagiarize, if they do at all, on the big final project, which is worth 30-40% of the grade. Since they need at least a C in the class to graduate, a zero on that assignment does the trick (and yes, I do make it a zero, not just an F, and I have to take it through the honor process to do that, but ours is well-run, so the process involves an hour or two of paperwork, but not a lot of hassle beyond that).
My sympathies to all who don't have strict and efficient honor processes to back them up. It really does help.
The grade penalty for plagiarizing needs to be at least twice that for not doing the assignment at all
ReplyDeleteNo argument. But in a lot of schools, the instructor doesn't actually have the authority to independently assess a penalty that severe. Several of the schools I've taught at allowed students whose grades were affected by plagiarism charges to appeal penalties to fairly student-friendly boards. Once your class population gets beyond a certain level, the potential logjam which appeals would create just looks like more trouble than it could possibly be worth.
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ReplyDeleteWell done Monkey. Excellent flanking maneuver.
ReplyDelete"When the enemy is at ease, be able to weary him; when well fed, to starve him; when at rest, to make him move. Appear at places to which he must hasten; move swiftly where he does not expect you."
--Sun Tzu