O Cursed class lists!
Some damn boomerangs came back.
Thought they were frisbees.
[+]
Dimwit Dan: Sigh. You’re polite and show up to every class, but you Just. Don’t. Get It. And by “It” I mean Anything. You appear to have no reading or listening comprehension. I returned an assignment to you and others for revision, with the trouble spots highlighted on the rubric. You returned it to me with no changes because you “didn’t understand what the problem was, because there were no comments.” Then you failed the quiz and midterm. I urged you to drop, and you rephrased this as, “So I have some areas I’m good at, and some I need to improve.” I tried to find something you’re good at. “Yes, Dan, you’re good at attending class. But we expect a certain level of reading and writing in college, and it's not clear to me that you have those skills.” "So I'll need to work harder." Sigh. This is our fourth semester together, Dan. You made two attempts at the prerequisite class and then barely passed it while failing the EXACT SAME assignments the third time. Repeating Rita: Sigh. Yes, you took this class last semester. Yes, you’ve heard this lecture before, and done these hamster-fur-weaving activities. Yes, you still should take notes. Yes, you must do the lab activities. Because these Ds and Fs show that again your confidence is unwarranted. Unless you want the same grade as last time.
When my boomerangs make me sigh, I feel at one with the Master:
Yep. I've got one of those now, though he's actually passing at this point.
ReplyDeleteI will likely have others, after I advise this latest batch of 4 to drop now because they cannot pass.
Proffie Galore is the best tea-partying user name we've EVER had!
ReplyDeleteWhat Will said (he beat me to it). Best. Username. Ever.
DeleteThanks! Fab made me the best blurry avatar ever too.
DeleteGood thing he did, because my tech savvy is limited to flying planes. (I'm trying to reply using my brand spanking new AIM account, but it keeps saying I'm anonymous, even though in the intermediate step, it shows my username and avatar. What's a Bond girl to do?)
Delete@PG: Didn't you wield a mean karate chop in Goldfinger? Or you could carry a knife like Honey Ryder in Dr. No, or a sub-machine gun like Tiffany Case in Diamonds are Forever, although come to think of it that didn't work well for her.
DeleteActually, it was judo. "I didn't know you knew judo. We musht have a few fahsht falls sometime."
DeleteThe karate expert was Dr. Holly Goodhead in Moonraker. Bond: "Where'd you learn that? Nasa?" Goodhead: "No, Vassar."
DeleteI remember press at the time saying how the Bond series was going all feminist because Holly Goodhead had a Ph.D.!
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ReplyDeleteI have several boomerangs in my third semester, calculus-based physics class for engineers. One might think there wouldn't be so many of these in a third semester class: methinks it bespeaks low standards, but then since the engineering school lets them get by with D grades. All my boomerangs are dangerously innumerate, for engineers. Just as bad is that more than enough of them have the nasty habit of burning up lots of class time by asking off-topic questions. I really shouldn't be so accomodating.
DeleteEven Landolt's 'before' picture has a certain impish Yoda-ness to it. And besides, how many of us will ever be immortalized online with a URL that reads 'FirstnameLastname_16inch.jpg' (or does a Jedi crave not such things?)
DeleteUncanny that is.
DeleteI've got a boomerang who missed a few days of class and has been missing homework assignments for the past two weeks (which is partially what led him to fail last semester). When I ran into him in the hallway today, he said, "I'm sorry I missed class yesterday. Look at my new iPhone!" waving an iPhone 5 in my face. I asked him why he hasn't been doing the homework, and he took a very frustrated tone in telling me that he always forgets when the deadline is, and when he logs into the website to do it, he finds out that he missed the deadline. He then said to me, "I don't know how I can remember to do the homework on time."
ReplyDeleteI pulled out my own iPhone 4S and said to him, "Like this." I held the home button down to activate Siri and said, "Remind me to do my math homework at 5 PM on Sunday." My phone immediately set an alarm for 5:00 PM on Sunday, with a reminder to do homework.
He was too busy to exit the game he was playing to set up a reminder. Something tells me he'll forget to do this later.
Pwned.
DeleteThey could go really old school and get a Day Runner with a schedule calendar/planner. They couldn't use the excuse, "I forgot to charge my phone."
DeleteThey would, however, actually sit down and THINK, and PLAN their week ahead of time. Then would come, "I lost my Day Runner."
What is our ethical obligation to tell boomerangers that they need to drop out NOW? My SLAC's $33k tuition is a steep price (in student loans) for the majority of our students. Yet, we have several of these who just keep coming back with more energy that that darned bunny seems able to muster.
ReplyDeleteAlthough Yoda didn't say it, I still think "There's a sucker born every minute" and "A fool and his money are soon parted" provide some guidance for this situation. If they think the customer is always right, then screw 'em.
DeleteLet's not forget to paraphrase Mark Twain: "An education is the only thing people are willing to pay for and not get."
DeleteBut CC raises an important point. Isn't it negligent (at least) or cruel (at most) to string along incapable students who are incurring substantial debt but most likely won't get a degree?
And what about the ethics of triage? Should boomerangs be allowed to retake classes when potentially hard-working, capable students can't get the classes they need?
A two-strikes-you're out policy enforced in the absence of documentable excuses (family crisis, serious illness, etc) would do wonders for this. And it would really only be needed for core courses, since those are too often the sticking points. I marvel at our students who climb through the department curriculum with relative ease, yet can't muster the gumption to just pass their intro to academic writing class even after five tries.
DeleteHonestly, once you've attempted X number of credits but have not earned enough credits, the federal gubmint cuts off your loans.
DeleteSo eventually, the only way they can come back is when they can pay for it out of pocket.
See here: http://studentaid.psu.edu/eligibility/federal-student-aid-satisfactory-academic-progress-standard
DeleteWhat about private loans? I fear some students get so stuck on the idea that they must finish college, now, that they take out increasingly expensive loans to do so (of course, if they turn to credit cards, at least those can be discharged in bankruptcy; that's not entirely a bad thing).
DeleteWhatever happened to the idea of academic probation and/or suspension as a response to repeated failing grades? A semester or year off might force them to rethink what they're doing. Or do they just go to another college instead of actually stopping and thinking?
I've many times thought that maybe a year off after high school working in the "real world" would be a great benefit to many.
ReplyDeleteDitto that, CrayonEater. I've told some students that the best thing for them would be to leave school and work at a job that truly sucks. That's often one hell of a motivator.
ReplyDelete