Monday, April 8, 2013

A Speedy Rant on Naming from Loveland's Lovely Leona.

Apparently students don't realize that I can see the titles of their documents when they submit a paper by email. BULLSHIT.docx and researchpaper_lame.doc come through clear as day, boys and girls.

It tempts me to return their documents with titles such as Smith_idiotic.doc and Jonesilliterate.docx.


  1. My favorite example of this was when I got a paper named "[CLASSNAME] [DATE] Paper #2," where [CLASSNAME] was not my class and [DATE] was from two years ago. Oh, yeah, and we were on Paper #3 in my class, not #2. Not to mention that the paper didn't really follow the prompt very well, even though it was (more or less) on the same material.

    Following a conversation with the instructor of said class, in my own damned department, I should note, there was a brief but extremely amusing conversation with the student, who went from cluelessly innocent to righteously angry to politely apologetic to blubberingly hysterical to bitterly angry all in about the space of ten minutes. I swear, the kid was running through every emotional manipulation s/he had to hand, just hoping one of them would work.

    The dumbest part of the whole story is that the kid could have passed the class except that s/he didn't ever bother coming back. The papers in that class were worth increasingly more points, to give the students a chance to work out the kinks in the writing process with lower-stakes assignments, so s/he could have passed with a little effort on the third and final paper.

    Dumb kids.

  2. Oh, yeah! I got one that was saves as Poop101.docx. I didn't feel obligated to give it a grade other than what the author felt it deserved by naming it in such a way.

  3. You should see the profile pictures they use for their online campus accounts. They run the gamut from saucily-clad and sexily posed women to a guy with his face painted in a sort of death-metal-meets horror-movie freak show.

  4. I apologize. I may have deleted a comment inadvertently. I believed it to be the work of a fairly frequent spammer.

  5. I have had the e-mail version of this (aka "") but never an inappropriately named essay! I love it!

  6. I has someone forward me their paper directly from the "editing" service.