After years of lurking, I've signed on to be a correspondent.Good Christ, has it really been years? Apparently so.
Rate Your Students got me through grad school, until it crashed flaming into the ground. RYS, that is, not grad school. (But we all have our fantasies.) Then College Misery rose from its ashes like some deranged phoenix fueled on boxed wine and broken dreams, and I followed dutifully along.
So here I am, now a tenure track professor at a SLAC you've never heard of, and the time has come to contribute to this community I've relied (often heavily) upon.
I honestly don't know what form that contribution will take, but if you're willing to read along - or at least politely scroll past - I'm willing to see what happens.
If nothing else, I can help the other three of you ruin this page as swiftly as possible.
I got the flu--or something like it--presumably a week or so ago when we had that crazzzy cold norther blow through. It hurts just to read a few paragraphs. J. Harker, I hope you brought some chicken soup and orange juice and bourbon. And could you massage my feet and get me some Nyquil? You can ruin the page tomorrow; tonight get me a cold, wet towel for my head. Please?
ReplyDelete@Harker: I hope you didn't interpret my pain-inspired lightheartedness as oppressive negativity. My head really hurts, and it's certainly not your fault. Welcome to the nightmarish misery.
DeleteNot at all. But I'm not touching your feet. Not unless you ask reeeeaaalll nice.
DeleteWelcome baby!
ReplyDeleteWelcome, J. Harker. Will Van Helsing, Holmwood, and Quincy be making an appearance?
ReplyDelete(Sorry--taught Dracula recently, and your alias flipped the switch.)
Looking forward to reading your posts.
Just me, I fear. Mina may well pop by every so often, though...
DeleteWelcome!
ReplyDeleteBoxed wine and broken dreams - that's the hook to a country song, right?
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping Cal will turn it into a song.
DeleteWelcome, J. Harker.
Whatever it is, it's brilliant (especially when you include the deranged phoenix part, which makes sense -- given their origins, wouldn't you think that most phoenixes might be well, a little off?).
DeleteWelcome, J. Harker!
Excellent ideas all.
DeleteWelcome, J. Harker.
Beaker Ben - If it isn't, it should be.
DeleteHey, welcome! May all the broken dreams you encounter belong to your lazy, stupid, plagiarizing students!
ReplyDeleteI count myself fortunate that I have but few of them! For the most part, I quite enjoy my students.
DeleteHope you have a thick skin. This place is brutal.
ReplyDeleteIt is the internet.
DeleteWelcome, J!
ReplyDeleteTo the ruination! Salud!
ReplyDeleteWelcome! We are glad you are here!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks all! Glad to be here.
ReplyDeleteA) Can I hook up one of those bags from a box of wine into a Camelback?
ReplyDeleteB) Would that be noticeable under ye olde pleated yolk back regalia robe at interminable commencement thingie? Maybe I can claim scoliosis? Or should I stick to a flask?
Take two water bottles.
DeleteVodka in one.
Water in the other.