Thursday, September 12, 2013

If It's Thursday, I Must Be Tingling Because I Met Jesus.

Jesus came to my office today,
in disguise.

20 years old,
very wise.

"Your soul is muddy,
said he.

"I can tell from the readings,
you see.

Negativity and cynicism
cannot win.

Jesus will help you,
if you let him in."

I smiled during it all,
a pleasant grin.

Then hurried home,
to Mrs. Tingle and gin.


  1. God in his wisdom
    Made Tingles and gins
    Believers and sybarites
    Everyone wins…

  2. Oh, good! I was already worrying that you had been harvested for parts.

  3. Replies
    1. At least he gave you an escape clause, "...if you let him in." I had one case who simply would not let up: he knew the duration of my office hours, and tortured me for every minute.

      I had another case who came in just after I presented the Big Bang in class. He fervently damned my soul to eternal hellfire. I reminded him that he doesn't have the authority, and that proper Christians don't make claims about other people's souls, since their proper concern should be their own.

    2. Good comeback, Frod. I'll have to remember that to use on the next turbo that accosts me.

    3. When the opportunity arises upon being confronted with the judgemental type (only about 2 times in the last 10 years; at times I teach evolution so the possibility is always lurking...), I'm much less polite about it than you are, Frod, if the person is not polite about it, e.g. "fer crying out loud, you don't even know about the religion you purport to believe in! Any idiot knows that only God can judge someone's soul, and 500 years ago you might have been burned at the stake as a heretic for claiming the be able to do so! I suggest you go back and read your book again, and this time pay attention to the words inside before you start spouting off about it."

    4. The only conversion attempt I've endured has been by a Muslim student -- who I'm sure meant well (the doctrine of the Trinity really is an odd concept, and, I realize, can sound blasphemous to other monotheists), and probably didn't realize it was Maundy Thursday. I'd consider it fair payback for the Jews for Jesus's occasional practice of stepping up activities around this time of year (Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur), except that I've never tried to convert a Jew (or a Muslim, or anybody else) in my life. Why didn't God visit her on a more evangelical Christian?

  4. You've dodged him, Dick, but he'll be back.

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  6. Hesitant as I am to speak for Him, I think Jesus would approve of your response.