Monday, October 7, 2013

Today on "Professor Facepalm": We Cracked the Code!

Ah, mid-terms.

I weep for the future. Half of it, anyway.

Most of the students in Class #1 show up regularly, participate, and generally pay attention. They had an average in the high 80's, with a nice crop of "A"s. The majority of Class #2 is absent, most days, and when they are present physically, they are still missing mentally. Has this affected their grades?

Well, duh. Observe some of the gems:

Q. What is Virgil's Aeneid about?
A. His poems.

Q. What started the Trojan War?
A. The death of Julius Caesar.

runner-up:
A. a woman [they always blame the women, eh?]

Q. What was the function of the Great Pyramid of Giza?
A. To honor Gilgamesh after he'd died.

runner-up:
A. religion

Q. To what historical act does the phrase "crossed the Rubicon" refer, and why was this deed so significant?
A. It refers to George Washington crossing the Platomic. [sic]

runner-up:
A. They wanted the people to cross over, to have an afterlife.

Q. Why is the Code of Hammurabi historically important?
A. Because we were able to break the code.


9 comments:

  1. The runner-up answer to "What started the Trojan War" does get to the heart of the matter... except that Homer traces it to three jealous goddesses. But then, the Greek gods never behaved as well as actual human beings did.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Without some idea of whether the kid in question was referring to Eris, Helen, or - god help us - an incorrectly-assumed-to-be-female Paris, I couldn't in good conscience count that one right. Besides, saying Helen "started" the Trojan War is a little victim-blamey, eh what?

      Delete
    2. I didn't say it was defensible as a two-word answer; I said it was defensible.

      Delete
  2. There are no labels on this post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There is no requirement for labels, PP. It does help readers find posts, and the tweetie-domo says it helps on Twitter. But community members are free to skip labels if they choose. Occasionally we add labels, especially the poster's name, so info is more easily found.

      Delete
    2. I don't use labels for the same reason I don't use hashtags: lack of understanding not-so-cleverly disguised as curmudgeonly contempt.

      Delete
  3. "Q. To what historical act does the phrase "crossed the Rubicon" refer, and why was this deed so significant?
    A. It refers to George Washington crossing the Platomic. [sic]"

    What a silly answer. Everyone knows it refers to the first time a person solves Rubicon's Cube. Duh.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I can sympathize. Just finished grading my first batch of tests for my Intro to Rodentology course at Mediocre Small State University, and was absolutely gobsmacked by the functional illiteracy demonstrated by a decent percentage of the cohort. I didn't realize I had been living the high life teaching courses at Mediocre Large State U.

    My favorite part is how students demonstrate they never, ever, read when attempting to spell words phonetically and usually butchering it. For fuck's sake, I had one student spell "different" as "diffrin"

    ReplyDelete
  5. Gilgamesh sure got lots of pyramids in his honor.

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.