Thursday, December 12, 2013

Final Exam Twits.


24 comments:

  1. Last year I got a panicked telephone call from a colleague who said, "Could you go over to Xxxxxx Hall and see if my class is there? I think I forgot my final."

    I said, "Sure, will you be much longer?"

    "Uh," he said. "I'm actually out of town. Could you tell them I've decided that their work was so good this term that I'm giving them 100s for the final?"

    I went to the room and the entire class was there. I told them what my colleague said, and a roar of approval rose the roof.

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    1. I'm going to do this to a class of students I don't even know. That would be evil, wouldn't it? Totally evil.

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    2. That would be the other-end-of-the-semester variation on the person who goes in on the first day of class and pretends to be the professor (sometimes the professor from hell). But, yes, considerably more evil.

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    3. I'd never really do it; those things only happen in movies and on YouTube, right? :)

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    4. Oh CC, thank you for the best laugh I've had all week.

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    5. I hate to point this out, but: which CC?

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  2. Welcome to the Island of the Absent-Minded Professors.

    Jesus. I can't imagine doing this, but I guess there's always a way this could happen. Sudden illness. Early-onset Alzheimer's. Drunk.

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    1. Indeed. I'm afraid to say I'd never do that, because then I'd manage to do it somehow. But really, don't these folks realize how much scrutiny higher ed is under these days? We don't need people acting like the stereotype of the absent-minded/entitled/entrenched/lazy professor. The resulting increased scrutiny will make all of our lives harder.

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  3. I know that Terry P is a favorite around here, so I'll try to tread lightly.

    But it seems to me most of his copy and paste posts are about making fun of professors (proffies?)

    I'd guess he was a disgruntled grad student or an under achieving part-timer somewhere, and he gets his jollies by making fun of the people this page is written for.

    And, obscuring the names of the "twitters" could possible mean he's writing some or all of them himself. I don't want to be a conspiracy theorist about it, but it seems wrong and I thought someone should speak up.

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    1. Faculty not doing their jobs falls within the boundaries of college misery because these idiots make their colleagues' work harder. This page is written for faculty who do not forget their final exams.

      Has it occurred to you that any of us could be making stuff up here?

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    2. We're not supposed to make stuff up? Oh, dear. I'm actually a tenured proffie in a cushy 2/1 job who assumes the Cassandra alter-ego in solidarity with my contingent colleagues. Busted.

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    3. Oh, and call out the lame-ass professors who don't show up for the final or who cancel them for no reason. Go ahead. Call them out. This site is also about the misery that profflakes cause us.

      PS No one actually printed professors' names, and all these tweets can be found on the twitter feed.

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    4. Prickly, if you examine the diversity of posts on this blog, a segment of Misery is generated by our colleagues who are profflakes, and so a segment of the scorn and derision we generate is directed at them.

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    5. Whoa, don't know what happened there with all those repeats...

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    6. Prickly: your Google-fu is weak. You should work on that, otherwise your students will be cutting and pasting all over your assignments. Each of the above tweets can be quickly and easily found using an internet tool known as "Search".

      By the way, I'm the disgruntled grad student, not Terry P.

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    7. Under-achieving part-timer here. At a hopelessly irrelevant community college, no less.

      Get bent. Seriously. Sorry we can't all be tenured at Yale, dude.

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  4. I actually dream about missing finals and not being able to find the classroom, so for people to actually do it doesn't help my anxiety. :)

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    1. FWIW, I also have this reoccurring nightmare!

      Sometimes I also dream that I am called into the Dean's office or HR, where I am told that the paperwork on my last two degrees wasn't processed and so I am ineligible to teach and basically an intellectual and academic fraud. I wake up in a cold sweat every time.

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  5. How are we supposed to know whether or not some of the professors cancelled the final via Blackboard and/or via an announcement in class and the twit is just now figuring that out?

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    1. I have to think that if the student was the ONLY person at the final, he/she would say something like: "I went to the final on the wrong day." Nobody is stupid enough to visit an empty final exam room and think, "Hmmm, the teacher is not here, and no other students, but it must mean the professor forgot."

      I may be wrong. And what about the examples of profs who show up without the materials. Is that made up as well?

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    2. Nope, that was just forgetful professor stuff, I believe. With all of the technology available for portability, that's pretty dumb on their part. And to make the students wait until they went home to get the tests?!

      I had 6 students show up on the last day expecting to write their final essays in class when I had announced/written online, etc., ad nauseum that the paper was DUE that day.

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  6. I once forgot a final. No excuse. Just absolute flakery.

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  7. I walk into my midterms and finals for certain classes, ask students to take out their blue booklets, and announce their topic orally: "Discuss (whatever)" Long before I'd admit forgetting an exam in my office or at home, I'd spit a topic in their general direction. I have an exam of this nature coming up next Thursday; students have been told they will need to draw evidence from two of the seven works we read this semester; they will be told WHICH pieces and the topic when the exam session starts.

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