Thursday, March 19, 2015

We Have a New Miserable Home.


In keeping with how we do things, the survey has been a contrarian nightmare. 42% of respondents avoided the CAREFULLY chosen options and used write-ins: Omaha, Odessa, a wiseacre suggested ATHENS OH (guess who?), Oshkosh, Orono, etc. Of the CAREFULLY chosen options, Olympia WA was the favorite.

But Oilmont MT? How can you not want to be there?

Thanks to Ben for the suggestion. 

Now, everyone pack your guns, weeds, leathers, laptops, and canned meats. We will officially take over the Derrick Bar tomorrow morning. 

30 comments:

  1. I voted for Montana. We need to increase our presence there.

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    1. Oilmont, Montana, to be exact. It's an unincorporated town in Toole County.

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    2. Jesus, Oilmont Montana is good.

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    3. That is hilarious, because before I read these comments, I submitted a write-in for Billings, Montana. Montana seems to be a perfect expression of CM: lonely, hearty, isolated folk who might be cavalier with the lives of the animals in their care. Plus: no speed limits!

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    4. AM, I can't stop laughing when I think of Frod and the unfortunate(?) animals in the care of his students. Then I think about students being the animals in our care and I laugh even more.

      Yes, Montana has all the qualities that we appreciate here.

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    5. AM, unfortunately the no speed limit thing isn't true anymore. Last summer during the Grand Peoria Family Road Trip (c), we drove through Montana on the way to Mount Rushmore, and sadly the default speed limit on the interstate was 75. That didn't stop the three drivers in the Peoria clan from pushing 90, without penalty (mostly because the Montana State Patrol drives '76 Pintos). However, it is no longer an unlimited speed.

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    6. This blog is is in the right time zone for Oilmont, MT: Mountain Time Zone.

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    7. You had me at "Oilmont," but "Toole County" really clinched it. I actually Googled it to see if it was real (it was).

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    8. I almost applied for a job in Bozeman once; one of the few times my spouse has (openly) questioned my professional and personal judgement.

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  2. I voted for Delaware, because that's where all my credit cards come from.

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    1. And in keeping with the rules, I picked Odessa, pop. 315.

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  3. Omertà got my vote.
    But don't tell anyone.

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  4. Oilmont looks pretty good to me. One question, though -- is the cost of living reasonable, or has the oil boom pushed up prices? I already live in one high cost-of-living area; I'm not sure I can afford a second home in another (and I've still got to sell the place in Orange City. I'm not sure what happened to the one in Oxford; that was during the housing boom, and I think the bank finally repossessed it, and evicted the deadbeat tenants. That was a bit of a mess. My credit rating's probably in the toilet, so I may not be able to buy, or rent. Anyone want to take me in as a lodger? I'm pretty quiet, and with a 4/4/2 load, I'm usually in my university city anyway. Except when I'm teaching online. How's the internet access in Oilmont?)

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    1. One of these days we really should put on a "conference" with some nonsense title. We could go to Oilmont (or wherever) and get really drunk. Maybe have a fundraiser. I could use a vacation!!

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  5. Cal is apparently done hitting golf balls into the various ponds. He's sent in a photo that surely puts Oilmont over the top.

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  6. You crazzy motherfuckers! Oilmont? I have an ex-wife who works at the Derrick. She'll shit when she sees me drive up in that Z28.

    Fab? Haven't you learned that this blog game is a no-win? Everyone's loving you today, but it will turn, you wait and see.

    Has any checked on Terry Porter? I'm assuming that he's probably shot himself with a tranq gun or eaten 9 buckets of chicken to assuage what it took out of him to write the REVEAL. That was the shit, right there! Hats off, Prof. Porter. I suspect when Fab quits on April 9th that you'll be ready to come back.

    Anyway, good to see a lot of action on the page. I had stopped coming around and kept busy maintaining about 11 Ronda Rousey fan pages. But seeing as I've got zip to do except watch basketball, I'll hang my hat in Oilmont for a stretch.

    Walt

    PS: Is Darla here? Is she still married? Does that make me a bad guy? Mrs. Walt is up to her elbows in Zappo boxes. What is expected of a man in times like these?

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  7. I can't tell you how proud I am of all of you, seriously. When I saw the page about a couple of hours ago my black black heart just about burst. Well done, all.

    Like many of you, Terry's post yesterday just floored me.

    And when the cellies and the Skype started buzzing from Fab, I feared for the worst. Good for you, my brother, for stepping up. Know that, just as we said, Les and I are happy to help whenever.

    But, listen, seriously. That fucking yellow has got to go.

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  8. So what was up with the part about Terry P's daughter? That part had the ring of miserable truth. Is he okay?

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    1. I've gotten a lot of questions about Terry since yesterday. It's not my place, so I won't say much, but, sure, there were elements in Terry's magnificent post that surely came from some elements of his own life. I've been in contact with Terry a lot over the past two days and the only thing that troubles him is that he feels he let the page down a bit.

      It's nonsense. It's a tough gig, and he did it alone and he did it without having done a protracted stretch. And the page was SLOW, and he was trying to drum up activity any way he could. I and the other folks who have run these two pages were maybe not aware enough that he was going to ditch it all in order to get back a bit of time.

      He told me and the others that he woke up one day this weekend and realized half his sabbatical was gone and he'd done nothing, absolutely nothing. (I mean, besides Downton Abbey and all that BBC stuff.)

      He tells me he'll be around, and I believe he will. Again, I can't speak for him, and only know professional details about his life. I couldn't presume to wonder what the post had in it that might signal concern, but I completely understand PG's question and the other emails that have come in.

      I Skyped with him a few times yesterday and all seems well. I know he's glad we're carrying on. But I really don't think he has the necessary winter clothing for Oilmont.

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    2. Terry's fine. Fab and Les and I and he talked a few times yesterday. He's burned out. Wants to use the rest of the sabbatical wisely. That's it. He's peronally stout, you know, like any college professor has to be!

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    3. I must strenuously disagree with the notion that Terry has done nothing with his sabbatical. He has been editor-in-chief of an open access, peer-reviewed journal of superlative standards. That is very far from nothing. That is scholarship that counts.

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  9. Oh man, I hate that anyone spent any worry. We all have our things, of course; we saw that today from Bubba's lovely post.

    My personal tale is no worse than anyone else's. I'm maintaining a great relationship with my daughter and my reasons for stepping away from the page are purely to do with my professional life.

    I'm taking a bit of a break to figure out the last gasp of the sabbatical, but I will be back in the fall with all the angst and ennui that anyone can handle. (But I took the duck. There is NO way he's going to Montana.)

    Terry P.

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    1. Most ducks look exactly the same. I'm not worried. Montana is FULL of ducks. They're all in freezers, but, still.

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    2. Glad to hear all is well. I have to admit that the I'm-about-to-shoot-myself comments sometimes worried me just a little (but maybe I've just attended a few too many student support workshops about Taking Comments Seriously, and it's especially hard to judge these things on the internet, in a freewheeling space such as this). Maintaining a great relationship with your daughter is an important thing, and well worth any effort it takes (this coming from someone whose father, sadly, has not made the effort). And so, of course, is maintaining your professional life. I'm tremendously grateful to the folks who make this place run for a time, but I do worry about the amount of time (and effort, and angst) it obviously takes. I hope you get a bit of productivity and/or rest out of the rest of your sabbatical. That's what they're for, after all.

      P.S. Now that you and Fab have confessed to complicated romantic histories with Katie, we can spin all kinds of interesting theories. And JS's avowed crush on Ben makes the plot even more interesting.

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    3. I saw a lot of ducks driving through Montana last summer. They didn't look as happy as our duck. However, they did look happier than our alpaca, which if I recall correctly, was last Thanksgiving dinner. Both Canadian and American.

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    4. how did the ducks reach the steering wheel??????

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    5. I hope they figure it out, or else they'll have a quack-up!

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  10. As a geologist, the Derrick Bar is just my kind of dive.

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