You know what happens when you accept only part-time work in a new state? You can't deduct the move on your taxes.
You know what happens when your COBRA coverage runs out? You resort to buying even more outrageously priced gap coverage.
You know what happens when you try to get jobs outside of academia? Every single interviewer wants to know why you aren't a professor.
My darling and gentle readers, be prepared to answer questions like the following when you interview outside of the academy:
- "Tell me your thoughts and reasoning behind going from PhD to X company?"
- "Do you think you would mourn the loss of an academic career if you came and worked for us?"
- "Do you feel like a failure for leaving the academy." (This one was rather blunt and I had to smile really big and say how I thought I had more room for advancement at Y company.)
- "Wouldn't you like to teach K-12?" (This was not for a K-12 job. Don't get me started on how I would need to get another Master's to teach K-12, and how I will likely never get hired full time because this state pays based on education level. One PhD = two Bachelor-holding teachers. Simple economics ....)
- "Why don't you go and teach over at Misleading University?" (Been there, done that, and now they aren't hiring in my field.)
- "Why don't you work for Bigger University? Why work for us?" (Nothing available at Bigger U. I looked. I found your company online, didn't I? I looked at Bigger U's offerings as well.)
- "So, you don't want to be a professor anymore?" (I was a contracted/adjunct professor. Never tenured. I don't really think that qualifies as "professor" but it's sweet that you have no clue how gutted and divided life in the university has become.)
- "We don't really think someone with a PhD would fit in well here. Both of us (points at self and other hiring person) dropped out of college. Can you tell us how you'd fit in here?" (Imagine the questioner sneering and using a very contemptuous tone while asking this question.)
Here's how you survive as an academic when you have no library privileges:
- I'm young enough looking, so I dress like a student and go in to the nearest university library.
- The nearest decent R1 library is a two hour trip away.
- The parking is extremely expensive, so I try to go on days when the side streets are less likely to be jammed full of students trying to avoid paying the ridiculous parking fees.
- There are exactly three computers that are open to the public that do not require a university identity card to use.
- If all three computers are in use, or if they have been vandalized/broken, then I try to find a computer that has been left logged in. I need to see that card catalog. I can't see that card catalog when it is digital and on a "requires student ID card" or "university access only" computer. Just food for thoughts librarians. The PUBLIC can't use a PUBLIC library when you can't see the PUBLIC library's holdings.
- If all else fails, I lie to a student and say my paper is due next week and I left my card at home, and could you just let me use your login really, really quickly so I don't fail my class. It works most of the time. Unless they direct me to the librarian to get a temporary card. Then I say my license is with my student ID and I can't get a temporary card without the license.
- I then go to the online journal holdings of the library and do my searches. Then I download any article that might be half relevant and save it to my thumb drive to read at home.
- If I find out the resource I want/need for my project is something that I need Interlibrary Loan for, I silently curse and write down where it is. I make plans to convince the Other Half to go on vacation in that city/state so I can sneak off to the library.
- I can't check any books out, so I take as many books as I can read before the library closes.
- I read and annotate until the library closes.
- I run out to my car to see if the city has booted or ticketed me for staying longer than the two hours the public/street parking says you are supposed to stay. (Yes, the city tickets are cheaper than the parking at the university. That's how ridiculous even visitor parking is at this place.)
- I drive home for two hours.