Monday, November 18, 2013

An Early Thirsty From Dr. Python That Finally Gets to the Fucking Heart of It All.

Q: I know, my fellow mortals, that administrators would consider drinking while grading a mortal sin. 

 I want true confessions of how many of you drink, perhaps a bit beyond excess, when grading (best grading beverages?). 

 Are there certain situations which may make you more prone to doing so (like really, really boring and poorly written freshman papers)? (NOT that I would EVER do so....never!!!)




10 comments:

  1. Believe it or not, I don't drink while grading. It's true, I promise! To keep my mind alert for the repetitive activity grading is, I have a movie or video playing. It can't be anything I feel obliged to watch, though: it needs to be something I've seen a million times already, so I have enough free attention to get the grading done.

    Godzilla movies are great. I have "Destroy All Monsters" running right now! Another favorite is Jonny Quest, particularly the episodes where the villains' stupidity and rashness causes their own violent deaths. Horror movies, particularly ones in which the victims scream "AAAAAAHHHH!!!" before a quietus that's their own darn fault, are perfect for grading. The reasons are obvious.

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  2. I never ruin the pleasures of drink by sullying the experience with thoughts of students.

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  3. Frod and Surly sum up the case for sober grading well. Alcohol is the reward for finishing grading, or at least the reason to stop grading.

    Afterwards, it's usually beer for me and lots of it, though I enjoy a celebratory margarita if grading the last exam of the semester.

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  4. I remember telling a colleague that I had gone out to dinner and had a margarita and graded some papers. A student overheard and said in a (fake) shocked tone, "You were drinking while grading OUR papers?" And I said, "Do you want me to grade happy or grumpy?" The student thought for a moment and said, "Drink more, drink more!"

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  5. I will sometimes have a glass of wine or two while grading, but I try not to grade while intoxicated just because I am much, much nicer -- too nice. I slack off and forgive errors that I would otherwise make students correct.

    I did try grading just once while stoned, however, and sat down in shame the next morning ready to erase all my comments and start over when I realized . . . they were really quite good comments. Focused, direct, compassionate, and helpful. I was terrified at how much a better teacher I was cheesed, so I swore off weed.

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  6. I don't drink when grading; I don't like to associate pleasurable experiences with students, but it's a nice way to relax after getting all riled up...

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  7. Grading is one of the few things I don't want to do while drunk. I've done just about everything else drunk, but not grading. I don't want to make any errors while grading.

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  8. I often grade tests late at night, and then it's usually with a glass of cabernet next to me, and the laptop open so I can go on CM and other fun sites when it gets too boring. Math grading is maybe a little different; typically the amount of work on the page is minimal, and you can usually tell whether it's right or wrong in a second or two. When it's not almost entirely right or almost completely wrong, the question becomes: how much partial credit do I give for this? Then the wine helps put me in a generous frame of mind.

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  9. I envy a friend of mine who goes to a seedy bar in a neighboring town. She plugs the juke box full of quarters, orders a martini, and does her grading. I'm such a lightweight. I fear one drink and I'd be passing papers out to the local bar flies, buying them drinks in exchange for their assessment services.

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