Monday, November 3, 2014

Why oh why

Nobody blurs
like Cal.
do my students give me bulleted lists in response to a wide variety of assignments that explicitly ask for paragraphs, and only now, when I've asked for an outline, respond in paragraphs?

Also, why would anyone (let alone c. 25% of the class) start an outline with "my outline will discuss"?

Are outlines now a forgotten genre?  I'm not asking for an elaborate construction with upper and lower case roman numerals and letters and arabic numerals and 4 or 5 layers of indentations, mind you, just something that conveys a rough sense of what the major sections and subsections of the paper will be, what will be discussed in each, and how they fit together.  [And yes, I know I need to check my assignment, and figure out where they are getting the impression that I want a paragraph, and revise accordingly, and probably think up a new outline exercise for next semester, but right now I feel like complaining about the fact that I've just discovered one more thing that I learned in elementary school that I now apparently need to teach students halfway through college.]

9 comments:

  1. CC- they can't or won't follow instructions, so while, yes, we need to review our assignments blah blah blah, the painful reality is what you state-they haven't learned some important skills (outlining, following instructions, etc) or facts (who won the civil war, who is the vice president) in their K-12 education and we can't be expected to teach it all! My "didn't you learn this in grade school?" moment came during an exam where I wanted to drive home the point of making sure all of your data is in the same units before doing calculations. So I has some lame long jump example with measurements in both yards and others in feet. A full third of the class had to ask me how many feet were in a yard.

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  2. Ooh, I know why! It's because the last three times they gave you a bulleted list, you asked for paragraphs, so they have now internalized the idea that bulleted lists are bad and paragraphs are good. In other words, the same reason students are always sticking "whom" into papers where they mean "who." Somebody corrected "who" to "whom" once, and the idea that different choices are right in different contexts is apparently too much for their brains to handle.

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  3. You sound defensive. Like this crowd is going to blame your assignment instead of the students who probably didn't bother to read it! I think Porpentine's explanation is spot on.

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    1. Not so much defensive as reminding myself that, when push comes to shove, I have to teach the students I have, not the ones I'd like to have (or myself 30 years ago).

      I, too, think Porpentine has hit on the explanation. Students do like routine.

      And not only is Cal really good at blurring graphics; he has apparently hacked into my LMS site, read some of the more outline-like outlines, and transcribed their contents. Scary.

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    2. Remember when I posted about kicking the two rude guyrls out of my class? Cal put up a blurred image. The two guyrls in it looked EXACTLY like the ones I booted and the guy shutting the gate was dressed EXACTLY like our director of student services. (c.f. http://collegemisery.blogspot.com/2012/05/gwendolyn-hypocrite-and-emh-fuck-up.html)

      Cal may be clairvoyant and maybe he's always grabbing the right color of yarn for his grandmother without looking. Lace a little LSD with Cortexiphan, and God knows what's possible.

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  4. I know why (it's a REALLY simple answer):

    They are dumb. Really dumb. And.Getting.Dumber.

    I have been teaching 22 years, and their ability to follow simple directions has decreased drastically. Every year it gets worse. Thank God for the few students who make teaching worthwhile.

    When I get to thanking God for the ONE student who makes it worthwhile, I'm out.

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  5. I am expecting a pile of "papers" tomorrow. They had two previous assignments to work out the kinks, but I am not overly hopeful. It is maddening how little they actually read our comments on drafts!

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    Replies
    1. Oh, I guarantee you they read them. Just try writing something "rude" on their paper. They won't let you get away with it.

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  6. I still cannot believe that 10 years ago I had to begin adding the phrase "write an essay using sentences and paragraphs" into the instructions for a paper for a college-level course because of the whole bullet-point-essay phenomenon. Oh, and the 3-page, one paragraph phenomenon. I learned how to write using paragraphs in elementary school!!!!!

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