Monday, April 30, 2012

A Post-Class, Two-Weeks-Left-of-Class Rant From Academic Drag.

It might be inappropriate to tell my students to suck it up and grow a pair. But I really don’t give a fuck if they don’t want to be here. I don’t give a fuck if they think this class is boring. This class would be a hell of a lot less boring if they actually engaged with the fucking material. So they can just fuck off. So, suck it up, do your fucking work, and stop acting like a bunch of pissant children. Fucking entitled, self-important little testosterone-fueled douchebags. Honestly, grow the fuck up.

A bit more difficult if you didn’t do the fucking reading, isn’t it?

I don’t give a fuck if you are a business major who thinks he’s wasting his time. I think you are an idiot. Also, a jackass. “The jerk store called. They want you back.” You are so far behind my other section of this class that I have basically given up on you. I don’t care if you don’t learn anything. Honestly, with the exception of a few girls on the other side of the room, you are all useless. If you want to use class time to continue talking about your douchebag interests, go the fuck ahead.

 --Academic Drag

14 comments:

  1. Let it out!!

    It's the only thing that keeps me sane.

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  2. it really does feel good, doesn't it? I swear I'm not that angry all the time-- really! but some days you just get that perfect combination of too little sleep, not enough lunch, and a semester of petty bullshit from 18 year old boys who all went to high school together. my other 2 classes, by the way, rock.

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  3. This not reading thing makes me crazy, too. When I meet with the class, we're always talking about reading. If students don't do it, it's just me and a couple of good students who have a conversation. The rest? Most never even take a note.

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  4. I don't understand the not reading. How do they THINK they're going to understand anything if they don't read? That warrants lots and lots of cussing! Even the majors (English ones) don't do the reading. Whaaaaa?????

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  5. Even the majors (English ones) don't do the reading. Whaaaaa?????

    Who needs to read books when you can just look it up on Wikipedia?

    I can't find it online right now, but there was a story a year or so ago about a guy getting a graduate degree in philosophy from a good school and was getting by without reading books. Chopped up bits of text are usually enough. If you assign more, they won't read it.

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  6. A couple of weeks ago, in addition to reading a short article, my students were also supposed to watch a 16-minute historical video that showed, first-hand, some of the issues that we were about to cover in class. My intention was to discuss the video in the same way as we would discuss a text: looking for the point of view of its author; assessing its arguments; analyzing its viewpoint and its shortcomings.

    About 7 people out of a class of 40 watched the clip. You know it's bad when you can't even get them to watch YouTube

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  7. A direct quote from a recent midterm evaluation: "It's not fair that on the midterm you asked us such a specific essay question about a story we were supposed to read. I was very annoyed by that, because I didn't read that story. I know that you told us in class that the story was going to be on the test, but that still wasn't fair because it means you missed all the points if you didn't do the work."

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    Replies
    1. You might be surprised, EMH, by how many performers and directors are highly educated and intelligent people who are engaging in the theory and politics of porn through performance. Some of them even have MFAs and PhDs.

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    2. Where do kids learn to talk like political pundits? Are they actually watching Fox News in their spare time? This isn't a particularly artful example, but with some practice this person might actually manage to throw an honest person off their game.

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  8. The last class I taught, I cut out all exams and research papers and made 1-2 page reading responses 80% of the grade. They had to turn in these responses every week, on each and every one of the readings. And not open-ended "reading responses" where they talk about their feelings--I learned the hard way to give them specific questions and make sure they actually answer them. A short paragraph summarizing the author's main points (5 sentences max), a short paragraph connecting the reading to class concepts, done. My students hated it, but by god, most learned how to write a good, focused summary, a skill I find they are sorely lacking. And class discussions went much better, as most had actually read the reading and could talk about their response papers if nothing else.

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    1. @CiT - There is research that purports to show that people who have memorized text material can talk about it more critically and thoroughly than people who have studied it in other ways. There is something to be said for your approach. KNOW the stuff, then talk about it and build on it in class. But first, KNOW the stuff.

      Now, how do I do that online in an "a-synchronous," forum-based seminar? Any ideas would be welcome. I could make them pass an on-line, multiple-choice quiz about the reading before they do any posting, I suppose.

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    2. Writing is more effective than testing, though testing does help. I've done that kind of thing in online courses: it's a replacement for class discussions in which it's fairly quickly obvious who has and has not done the reading.

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