A Norwegian LipDub VidShizzle!

My goddaughter Rikke is in art school in Norway and does these amazing videos with her school mates. I would be pleased if you would share them with your professors.

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This Week's Professional Development Vidshizzle

Input, please

Ah, misery.

Last semester, I had a student. Let's call him Misogynist Mark. On Day One, Misogynist Mark introduced himself as an endangered specie: The rare White Conservative Christian Male. He said, with no trace of irony, that no American has it worse than the White Conservative Christian Male.

For context, you might have called my class "Weaving Baskets during Genocide."

The rest of my class was a constant struggle to strike a balance of interests. I would call on people during discussion or if they had questions during lecture. When Misogynist Mark spoke, he would ask me point blank what my politics were and if I were one of those Liberal Professors destroying America. I'm not exaggerating. He spoke like he was reading off a Glenn Beck script. Sometimes he would demand to know what church I went to. He complained loudly about how atheists couldn't possibly be good people. He interrupted discussion to plug corporate products. When I stopped calling on him, it fed into his feelings of persecution.

(the fact that he was brilliantly good at essays and exams only further pissed me off)

Predictably, 80% of my class hated him. I failed his participation, I spoke to him outside of class, and he began to change his behavior. But while I tried to balance his being an asshole with allowing some degree of free speech, I alienated a large sub section of my class. One woman felt I was privileging Mark's opinions because I too was sexist and perhaps enjoyed his view of women. Or at least, that's what I found out on the anonymous evals.

Science, Humanities: Can't We All Get Along?

See image credits below*

The image at right has been wandering around the interwebz lately, and I must admit, on first glance, I kinda liked it.  Many of us humanities types are feeling a bit beleaguered lately, what with stagnant salaries; and an increasing tendency to equate "contributing to the mission of the university" with bringing in outside grants, and rumors that Teresa Sullivan was fired (before she was rehired) for not eliminating "obscure programs such as Classics and German" (these rumors may or may not be true, just as it may or may not be true that such programs, even if lightly enrolled, cost the university any substantial amount of money, since they're cheap to teach, and, what's more, at least in the case of UVA, include some endowed chairs; the main point here is that the rumors sounded all too plausible to many humanists).  From that point of view, anything that points out that the humanities can have value, even for those who major in science, is welcome.

But I also realize that there are major problems with the assumptions underlying the image's message, starting with the implications that scientists could not  figure out by themselves whether a particular project would be a good idea, and would not, left to themselves, be inclined to do so.  It seems to me that many scientists do very good modeling/predictive work, and have pretty well-functioning ethical/moral compasses to boot, with or without formal training in ethics, philosophy, or the like.  At the same time, I'm pretty sure that formal ethical/philosophical thinking can inform decisions about what scientific research is and isn't appropriate, and why, and that a knowledge of history (Nazi Germany, Tuskegee, the (literal) fallout from early atomic experiments, etc.), literature (a wonderful playground for tossing around "what if"s,, and understanding the vagaries of human nature), psychology, sociology, etc., etc. can be useful for scientists of various sorts.  Besides, as Luke Maciak (from whom I borrowed this copy of the image, and who provides some useful additional critique of it) points out, cloning a dinosaur might not even be a bad, or at least not a disastrous, idea, under the right conditions. 

Honestly, I don't think the sciences and humanities are at war.  In fact, the competition between the two disciplines (broadly defined)  that this image reflects, and helps to perpetuate, may be a sign that we're fighting with each other while our aspiring corporate overlords (who have no more respect for science that has no immediate profit-making purpose than they have for humanists who are not currently engaged in writing press releases, ad copy, and/or incomprehensible legal disclaimers) rub their hands in glee.

So, I dunno. Maybe this is sort of a late thirsty, or maybe it's just a reflection.  At least where I am, it's way too hot to fight, and, as I point out above, I think we'd be stupid to do so anyway.  But further reflections, comments, etc., are welcome below.

*Original image created by Rachel Leiker for the University of Utah College of Humanities. Color shift for CM courtesy of Leslie K.

Trivia.

Michael Sokolski, 1926 - 2012

Regardless of how you feel about the invention for which Mr. Sokolski is primarily known, everyone out there has to admit that he's had a huge impact on all of our lives. Inasmuch as any obituary can relate in a relatively small space (and unfortunately, I speak from experience), it also appears that he had a very eventful life.

Rest in peace, Mr. Sokolski.

"In 1972, Michael moved to Santa Ana and married Joanne W. Mayo on July 2, 1972. That year, he founded Scan-Tron where he served as Executive Vice President of Engineering. As the engineer inventor of the multiple question, #2 pencil tests, Michael Sokolski revolutionized the method in which students, from all over the world, contend with test taking. He held multiple optical mark reading U. S. patents."

The complete obituary from the Orange County Register.

Oh, The Expectations.

As a father of two, both old enough that they don't need much hand-holding anymore, I have mixed emotions about the story below.


One side of me says, "Damn it, that's right, Bryan. Give that kid a gift that shows how extraordinary she and her trip has been so far." Another side says, "I pray to God this kid doesn't end up in my writing class. Because she's going to expect me to give her that kind of unconditional support as well."

Here's some flava, and the full article link below (in the manner):

Daily Awww: Dad's amazing grad gift
from HLNTV.com

On behalf of all the parents out there, let me just say: Thanks for nothing, Bryan Martin!

While we're sure your daughter Brenna appreciates the beautifully thoughtful graduation gift you gave her, it also pretty much guaranteed the rest of us will look like slackers with whatever gift we give our own children now.

I mean, what's an iPad, necklace or hearty pat on the back when compared to the lovingly sentimental item you spent 13 years creating for this one special day?

(Side note: This website's list of suggested graduation gifts includes luggage. Luggage.)

On the surface, Martin's gift of a copy of Dr. Seuss' "Oh, The Places You'll Go!" appears nice, if unspectacular. But it gets better once the book is opened.

Inside, the pages are filled with notes and remembrances from each of Brenna's teachers, principals and coaches which her dad asked them to write down at the end of every school year for the last 13 school years since kindergarten.

FULL ARTICLE

vague outline of compare-and-contrast Big Thirsty about spouses and civil-union partners and such....

This one is a bit personal, so you might want to pretend you didn't read it (and, therefore, couldn't have answered it). You could say it was too sloppy, so you moved on to the next post.

Teresa Sullivan ---> triumph.

(sleeps with a man who has a big brain and his wits about him)

Jerry Sandusky ---> prisoner.

(sleeps with married to a woman who seems to be a coward or an idiot)

Q. Ever notice anything about the connection between a proffie/dean/coach/student and hir spouse? Cause and effect? Ever not hire an incredibly awesome proffie because you were horribly unimpressed with hir spouse? Ever wish you had a better better half yourself--for the sake of your career? Perhaps the Sullivans thrive because they've got good husbands? Perhaps Sandusky-like crimes could have been prevented if more wives had had spines and hadn't turned a blind eye to fucked-up crimes? Was your partner the inspiration for your most creative ideas? Ever think you were a good proffie in spite of your spouse?

A. _____________________________________________

[Concoct crazy theories. Become outraged. Fall asleep. But be honest, dammit.]

Misery abounds in non-teaching tasks also.

One of my non-teaching tasks here at my R-1 university in Far Flung Colony is to handle graduate admissions into our very select programme in Deep-Sea-Diving. Very early this morning I got an email from Terry the Tadpole who has just finished a diploma in Fresh Water Paddling at Lowly ranked community college one state away. Terry wants to enter directly into the second year of our two year program. So I asked Terry to send me a sample of one of his diploma assignments. I duly received a mediocre assignment on Fly Fishing, which he told me was graded as an A+. [note we do not have grade inflation here, A+s are rarely given and are a big deal]. I read the assignment and found it riddled with typological errors among other things. The following email interchange occured.

Red: I see your assignment is full of typos and grammatical errors. You would not get an A plus for an assignment with errors like these here at the Deep Sea Diving Program. What topic were you wanting to pursue for your dissertation, as I will need to see if I can find a suitable supervisor for you?

Terry Tadpole: I take this personally--as an extremely rude way to response to a student query. How dare you question my ability as a student and hurt my desire to advance, and also insult the person who assessed my work-- based on grammatical errors and typos alone. I would assume that people who have PhDs would be better at being able to understand that these are unimportant issues. Next, i want to enter in a Deep Sea Diving program, not a Grammar program. I am no longer interested in R-1 University as I now know what sort of people I am likely be dealing in there.

What I actually replied: No offence was intended by my comment. I hope you will find success in your studies as you pursue them elsewhere.

What I wish I could have said: ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND???? Its 7am and I actually replied to your annoying emails. You come from Lowly College where at least one of your instructors is obviously an imbecile. You think the way to get me, the director of this prestigious program to admit you into my program is to insult me? You think grammar is unimportant when you are writing a dissertation? GO DROWN in the nearest puddle, moron.

What I should have replied: thank you!!! (for losing interest in us)

Online Summer Fun: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

We are halfway through Early National Hamster Fur Classics, so the class has pretty well separated itself into the students and the snowflakes, with the snowflakes further differentiating into the irritating but harmless and the "I'm counting the days till you're retaking this class with someone else" subsets.

The Good:

Soldier Sally is an Iraqi combat vet going to school on GI benefits. She has actually come to campus twice during office hours. She wants to excel in the class and asks good questions. She catches my mistakes and is polite when pointing out that a file hasn't loaded right or something I said should be visible isn't.  Her discussion posts are on topic, have lots of examples, and provide genuine insight into what she reads.  She is especially good at seeing how what hamsters wrote a long time ago influences our culture today.

Studious Stuart is disabled and takes online classes because he can't physically come to campus for long periods of time.  He wants to chat or email during office hours at least once a week. He already made arrangements to take his final exam at a testing center near home even though the final is still over a month away.  He has a strong sense of literary aesthetics and can analyze almost anything in terms of both culture and creative strategy. He also writes outstanding posts with no errors and is good at drawing out his classmates in discussion without being rude. He's the kind of student online learning is tailor made for because without it, he would not be able to get his degree.

Teacher whose barbed blog made headlines is fired. From USA Today.

A Pennsylvania high school teacher whose barbed blog posts about her students caused a national stir last year, has been fired for "unsatifsactory performance," The Philadelphia Inquirer reports.

Natalie Munroe, an English teacher at Central Bucks High School East, was fired Tuesday by the Central Bucks school board in a 7-0 vote, the newspaper says.

In a statement, the board president said Munroe had been experiencing "performance difficulties well before her blog became an issue."

In anticipation of the dismissal, Munroe had filed suit against the board last week, claiming it had violated her constitutional right to free speech "by harassing and retaliating against her."

Munroe was suspended in February 2011 -- and later reinstated --after her blog posts, which referred to some students as "dunderheads" or "ratlike," became widely circulated.

FULL ARTICLE.

Earlier on CM.

And Another.

Professor fired after expressing climate change skepticism. From Fox News.

Oregon State University chemistry professor Nicholas Drapela was fired without warning three weeks ago and has still been given no reason for the university’s decision to “not renew his contract.”

Drapela, an outspoken critic of man-made climate change, worked at the university for 10 years.

In the early years of his career, he published a number of textbooks, received a promotion to senior instructor and, in 2004, received a Loyd F. Carter award for outstanding and inspirational teacher.

In 2007, Drapela began giving talks on his own climate change skepticism. He often and openly questioned the science behind man-made global warming.
Drapela told the Daily Caller he was “blindsided” when the department chair called Drapela into his office to fire him on May 29.

“He read a prepared statement and took my key,” Drapela said, adding that he was given no reason in this meeting as to why he was being let go.

Read more: 

Housing woes

My students are being relatively cooperative.  One is giving me grief about not getting commented material back in time to rework the next assignment.  He's right, and I have complained similarly to my instructors in the past.  One is asking many, numerous, insightful questions, not during class time.  I'm working hard at not being annoyed by it, because it is exactly the engagement I want, and he's not struggling, he's learning and using and curious.  It's a wonderful problem to have.

On the other hand, my housing situation is making me do much research into local law.  Feel free to ignore my long, and not-directly-related rant, but I required a place to vent

My landlord, let us use the name Pat, lived here for multiple decades.  (Apparently married to an Asst Prof at the school for the first 5-10, so the records indicate).  A recent e-mail (I love e-mail communication, so nice and documented) from Pat attempted to mollify my complaints by suggesting that the house is quite old, and sometimes old houses have minor problems.

"If Only..." From the Chicago Trib.

Brazil will offer inmates in its crowded federal penitentiary system a novel way to shorten their sentences: four days less for every book they read.

Inmates in four federal prisons holding some of Brazil's most notorious criminals will be able to read up to 12 works of literature, philosophy, science or classics to trim a maximum 48 days off their sentence each year, the government announced.

Prisoners will have up to four weeks to read each book and write an essay which must "make correct use of paragraphs, be free of corrections, use margins and legible joined-up writing," said the notice published on Monday in the official gazette.

A special panel will decide which inmates are eligible to participate in the program dubbed "Redemption through Reading."

"A person can leave prison more enlightened and with a enlarged vision of the world," said Sao Paulo lawyer Andre Kehdi, who heads a book donation project for prisons.

"Without doubt they will leave a better person," he said.

Final Grading Misery

Minutes between the time I revealed final grades on the LMS and the time not one, but two, grade complaints landed in my inbox: <20

Percentage of those complaints that ignore information about grading prominently available on the syllabus, and recently alluded to in an end-of-the-semester email: 100%


When I will answer said emails: some time tomorrow. I'm going to bed now.

Aargh.  It wasn't a bad term, really.  Most of them did good work; a significant number of them did very good work.  But I am very, very tired of explaining why satisfactory completion of lightly-graded ancillary tasks does not magically turn B work on core assignments (the grades for which they don't, interestingly, question)  into an A in the class.

The syllabus does say that participation will be graded on a curve, with the median at B.  Also, I checked to make sure that enforcing this policy as written wasn't dragging anybody's grade below the level of their major written assignments.  It wasn't.  I could, of course, lower the weight of the ancillary assignments relative to the final grade, which would probably decrease the tendency to put too much hope in them as final-grade-lifters, but then they might not take them seriously.   

Or I could grade every little ancillary task on a formal scale, holding to the "satisfactory=B" line each time.    That might in some ways be clearer, and thus fairer, but it would be time-consuming, and  I'd be answering "why did I lose points on x" emails all semester long.  The idea that a student didn't lose points, (s)he just did work at the B level, rather than somewhere above that, is very, very hard to get across.  Answering the complaint emails at the end of the semester may just be a worthwhile tradeoff for getting to concentrate on more substantive matters during the rest of the term.  Maybe.  I'll sleep on it.

Update, c. 12 hours later: of the six grading complaint/inquiry emails I now have in my inbox, all are from students who earned a B+. Maybe I should just stop awarding B+s?

A Reader Writes: "Here's An Article I'm Putting on WebCT."

“You are such a great teacher and I hate to bother you but…”: 
Instructors' perceptions of students and their use of email messages with varying politeness strategies 
by San Bolkan* & Jennifer Linn Holmgren
 from Communication Education: Volume 61, Issue 3, 2012

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It's not your email I hate, it's you.

Participants were exposed to one of five hypothetical emails from a student regarding the possibility of meeting outside of scheduled office hours to discuss an exam grade. Each of the scenarios differed in its level of politeness according to Brown and Levinson’s (1987) politeness strategies... After reading one of the five hypothetical emails, participants were asked to respond to a variety of measures as they pertained to both the message and to their perceptions of the hypothetical student who sent the message.

The results are summarized pretty well in their Table 1, which shows the correlations between level of politeness of the message, the instructor's affect toward the student (e.g., "he's a fool"), the instructor's estimate of the student's probable success in the course(very low to very high), the instructor's perception of the student's competence, and the instructor's level of motivation to work with the student (i.e., acquiesce to the student's demands in the email).

They suggest that Affect ("I hate you") is the mediating factor that strongly influences an instructor's motivation to work with the student and his/her perception of that student's competence and likely success. The positive correlations mean that more politeness = more positive affect = higher motivation and greater perceived competence and likely success. There are a lot of juicy bits in the general discussion, but this one was my favorite:

If students are not mindful of their use of emails, their communication with professors could be problematic considering the negative effects of less polite messages. This is especially the case considering that Stephens et al. (2009) found that students are less bothered by casual or impolite emails than professors, and that Foral et al. (2010) found that faculty members perceive students’ tones change to be more unprofessional in email when compared to face-to-face interactions. Thus, students may be sending messages that harm their relationships with their instructors... If professors’ perceptions of students > are less favorable, students may not receive many of the benefits of out-of-class communication, and therefore may be diminishing their potential for academic success by reducing their instructors’ motivation to work with them and perceptions of their potential in class.

Probably requires some kind of institutional login to access full article, but you can click here if you want to try!

Sullivan.

U. of Virginia Board Votes to Reinstate Sullivan

Justin Ide for The Chronicle

President Teresa Sullivan and and Rector Helen Dragas enter the rotunda for Tuesday's meeting.

Enlarge Image

By Sara Hebel, Jack Stripling, and Robin Wilson

Charlottesville, Va

Teresa A. Sullivan was reinstated as the president of the University of Virginia on Tuesday, completing the arc of an improbable comeback tale that began a little more than two weeks ago with her forced resignation.

The Board of Visitors voted to restore Ms. Sullivan, the university's first female president, to office. The action reverses her announcement of 16 days earlier, in which she said she would step down, citing an unspecified "philosophical difference of opinion" with the board.

The resignation stunned many people at Virginia and beyond, coming just two years into Ms. Sullivan's tenure at the helm of one of the nation's most elite public universities.

In the tumultuous days that followed, faculty, alumni, and students came to the defense of the president, who won praise for her consensus-building style of leadership. Her self-described "incrementalist" approach to change stood in sharp contrast to urgent transformation that leaders of the board, including Helen E. Dragas, the rector, have said the university needs instead.

FULL ARTICLE FROM THE CHRONICLE.

RUFKM? From ChrryBlstr.

Hi Professor ChrryBlstr. 

I hope you are having a great summer. 

I wanted to know if you are going to be teaching Think Critically, Dammit in September this year? I am very interesting in taking this course with you in September because I have heard a lot of good things about you and the course itself (from Super Nice Girl in particular) but I am in bit of a problem. I am doing a full time internship through the university program (I am also doing a Computer Science major). This means that I won't be able to attend class come September. But I just wanted to know if I can take the course with you. I will be doing all the readings  and catching up on slides and will email you if I really get stuck somewhere. I have worked with flash in the past so I am not  a total beginner. Do you think I can take the course? 

Thank You

-No Show Snowflake


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Dear No Show,

First of all, I am teaching the course in September.

This seems to be a bit of an odd request, since you're asking me if you can take the course without coming to class. Although I cannot prevent you from taking the course, I definitely don't suggest taking it if you won't be coming to ANY classes. Even the tests are scheduled during class time. Also, a major component of the course is the final flash project. While you may be proficient in flash, it is highly recommended that you attend one of the lab portions weekly. The TA does take attendance for the labs which is calculated in your final mark.
So, what it comes down to is how well can you really do taking a course that you won't be attending? This doesn't make sense to me, and I would advise against it. Obviously, not attending will reduce your chances of doing well in the course and, perhaps, passing. But with that being said, once again, I cannot make you not take the course.
I hope that this makes sense to you. Please contact me if you have any further questions.
Sorry for the late response but it is summertime and I don't check my e-mail as often.
Good luck with your decision! :)

Best,
CB

Why are American kids so spoiled?

Elizabeth Kolbert argues, in The Atlantic, that American kids need two things: to be given less supervision, to be given more responsibilities, and to be told "No." Wait, verily, those are three things.

Kolbert contrasts the situation with the way children are raised among the Matsigenka tribe, and in France. Some flava:

[In a study in the United States, it was observed that] an eight-year-old girl sat down at the dining table. Finding that no silverware had been laid out for her, she demanded, "How am I supposed to eat?" Although the girl clearly knew where the silverware was kept, her father got up to get it for her.

[A boy was observed to be unwilling to tie and untie his own shoes. His father did it for him.]

... [The] French believe ignoring children is good for them. "French parents don’t worry that they’re going to damage their kids by frustrating them," [Pamela Druckerman, an American ex-pat] writes. "To the contrary, they think their kids will be damaged if they can't cope with frustration." One mother, Martine, tells Druckerman that she always waited five minutes before picking up her infant daughter when she cried. While Druckerman and Martine are talking, in Martine's suburban home, the daughter, now three, is baking cupcakes by herself.

... [Among the Matsigenka,] toddlers routinely heat their own food over an open fire, ... while "three-year-olds frequently practice cutting wood and grass with machetes and knives." Boys, when they are six or seven, start to accompany their fathers on fishing and hunting trips, and girls learn to help their mothers with the cooking. As a consequence, by the time they reach puberty Matsigenka kids have mastered most of the skills necessary for survival. Their competence encourages autonomy, which fosters further competence—a virtuous cycle that continues to adulthood.

We've had this discussion before, over and over; I once observed that the reason that we came out OK was because our parents let us play in the street. Kolbert thinks so, too, and worries about the future of the Republic. We're doomed.

Read it all.

How Come We Can't Use Drop/Add to Get Better Students?

It can be exciting and nerve-wracking, but there are a few things a graduating high school senior should know about getting ready for college.

The authors of the book The Secrets of College Success, Lynn Jacobs and Jeremy Hyman, tell The New York Times freshmen should make sure the courses they choose are the right level for them. And they recommend using the drop/add process if the student feels he could get a better professor.

College juniors Daisy Kim and Nancy Miles say the best advice they have is that freshmen should complete their homework promptly.

"Oh my gosh, please, don't procrastinate," warns Kim.

"You'll hear it, like, all the time but literally, it's so serious," says Miles.

- From WTOP.com

I'm Baffled Why We Didn't Celebrate the Miseversary.

Didn't this lousy fucking site start 2 years ago Sunday? Why did we not celebrate? Is it because we're mired in summer's languid hold? Or are we just lazy?

At least they will graduate being good at something

Sorry for that it's been a long while since I posted here at CM.  Busy, busy, busy.  I am laying the groundwork for a whole new business model of higher education.  If you worried about becoming a whore to some education-corporation, don't worry.  Now it's the students' turn.

Here's the, um, flava. 

You may not think prostitution and academics are a good mix.  That's what they said about NCAA football too, and my idea doesn't even require a playoff system.  (Although...)

Schools provide employment as prostitutes to students in lieu of more college loans, or allowing students to pay off their loans.  The latter arrangement would only be available for those students or recent grads under 27 years old, unless the customer is one of those freaks that likes sex with old people.  No shit - you can actually find people like that on the internet.

The school provides safety and ease of payment for everybody and keeps a cut for themselves.  By providing a revenue stream that is independent of state taxes or alumni contributions, the school can lower tuition.

Just like in sports, very well qualified high school applicants can be given scholarships with the hope of making it big at the collegiate level before going pro.  The quality of a school's prostitutes can be a feature of campus recruiting.  Imagine the brochures and lip-dub videos.

Let me know how awesome an idea this is in the comments.

Can tenure survive ... again?

Apparently, we must be on ALEC's hit-list as yet another "Should tenure be abolished"? article has appeared, this time in the Wall Street Journal.


Flava from the "Readers comment" (which was appended to the article itself, along with the usual comment blog free-for-all).



YES

Of course. The concept is akin to a lifetime contract of employment, fictional everywhere but in academia. It subjects students to instructors who cease taking education seriously and are virtually impossible to discipline or remove.

—Mark Carter

I have three degrees from three different universities. Yet one thing remained the same—the tenured faculty performed much more poorly.

—Susan Strayer

As senior faculty at a major university with tenure for most of my career, I fully support the idea that tenure should be abolished. It serves only the lazy and incompetent. I refused tenure in my new post, and cheerfully suggested if I was ever not doing my job well, I should be sacked. Eight years later, I still have a job. So would anyone committed to the purpose of higher education.

—John Gwin

NO

Without tenure, most would be afraid to risk innovation and failure, which is the stuff great discoveries are made of. It took Jonas Salk five years to perfect the polio vaccine. Should he have been denied tenure every time a research trial failed?

—Jill Rooney

No, academia is not the corporate world where you have to become your boss's lapdog to keep your job. Professors should be allowed to conduct research on any topic without worrying about losing their job.

—William Harry

Sure, there are people with tenure who are blights. There are also people who get corporate jobs in the allegedly competitive private sector and keep them for years who are no better. There are bugs in every system.

—Frances

Teaching anything that challenges students to work harder, or transforms views they hold when they arrive, tends to generate lower "customer satisfaction" scores. Without tenure, the most entertaining professors who simply confirm students in their pre-existing beliefs would be the most secure in their employment. The whole of academia would be geared to producing a swarm of uncritical self-satisfied graduates who leave college with little more than they went in with.

—DrDoctorDr

FULL ARTICLE

Early Thirsty: Suggestions for Plagiarism-Checking?

This thirsty is prompted by the post from the LA Times article about essay mills and cheating. In the fall, I'm the grading assistant for a prof who has a reputation for not giving a flying f*ck about plagiarism. He assigns the same essay topics year after year, and it's rumored that students simply pay students who've taken the class previously for essays that passed. He has a different grading assistant every year, so this stuff is hard to catch. I'm sure the students plagiarize from other sources as well.

As the grader, I plan to be tough on plagiarism because A) I think the students should actually try to learn something by writing their own essays, dammit and B) it annoys me that this particular prof is giving our department and our discipline a reputation for being "easy" with his super-lax, anything-goes reputation.

Unfortunately, our university has an "honor code," and therefore officially believes that students will never cheat. Hence, there is no institutional funding for a subscription to Turnitin.com or similar plagiarism-catching websites.(Apparently nobody's heard of "Trust, but Verify" around here.)

So, the thirsty:

Q: How do you vet students' essays for plagiarism? What are the "clues" that I should be looking for? Are there websites where I can do plagiarism checks for free?

From the LA Times: Essay mills -- a coarse lesson on cheating.

Sometimes as I decide what kind of papers to assign to my students, I worry about essay mills, companies whose sole purpose is to generate essays for high-school and college students (in exchange for a fee, of course).

The mills claim that the papers are meant to be used as reference material to help students write their own, original papers. But with names such as echeat.com, it’s pretty clear what their real purpose is.

Professors in general are concerned about essay mills and their effect on learning, but not knowing exactly what they provide, I wasn’t sure how concerned to be. So together with my lab manager, Aline Gruneisen, I decided to check the services out. We ordered a typical college term paper from four different essay mills. The topic of the paper? Cheating.

FULL ARTICLE.

5 College Degrees That Aren't Worth The Cost. From USNews.

No degree guarantees that a college graduate will earn more over a lifetime than a high school student.

Worse still, there are many degrees where the average high school graduate will likely out-earn a college graduate.

If you’ve ever wanted to know the two main reasons why Americans decide not to go to college, the St. Louis Fed presented two convincing explanations. The more frightening of the two scenarios showed that, for students paying their own tuition, most will need a starting salary of $40,000 or better to overcome lifetime earnings of high school graduates.

• Social Work
• Elementary Education
• Drama and Theater Arts
• Family and Consumer Studies
• Anthropology and Archaeology

Full Misery.

From the Compound...

Campus television service to change on Thursday

Submitted by Web Coordinator on June 14, 2012 - 12:23am

Beginning at 10:00 am on Thursday, June 14 Miami will be switching to a new carrier for our campus television service.  Campus TeleVideo will now provide the campus with Direct TV digital television service on around 150 channels.  There may be a short service disruption between 10:00 and 10:15 am when the switch is made.

After 10:00 am all televisions connected to the campus system will need to be auto-programmed to receive the new channels.  This process will be different for each model of TV, so please check your television’s instruction manual for details.  Also be aware that the service will only be fully available to televisions that are digital-ready (have an ATSC tuner).  All other televisions will only be able to access 5 analog channels.  For a complete list of the new channels, please visit www.muohio.edu/tvchannels after 10:00 am on Thursday.

If you have questions or concerns regarding the new television service, please contact IT Help at 513-529-7900 orITHelp@muohio.edu. Also, follow us on Facebook at Information Technology Services at Miami University.

There's a party in my mind ... 'cause this online course is almost over.

Student post on course help forum: What's the lowest grade I can get and still pass this course?

Response: The passing grade depends on the requirements of your major.

What I didn't add: Fuck you too, dimwit.

The worst part of an online course that is not discussion-driven is that you only hear from the needy idiots, never from the good students who are getting it done.

End of the Story?

Article.

Coming Soon to a Campus Near You.

Karen Klein is probably not the first face that comes to mind when you think of a poster child for bullying.

Yet there she was, sitting in the back of Bus 784 as it rolled through the streets of Greece, New York, on Monday afternoon. Four middle school boys barraged her with verbal abuse, jabbing her about her weight, attacking her family and chuckling as they made violent and graphic threats. Except for a few even-keeled retorts, the 68-year-old bus monitor brushed sweat from her brow and remained quiet, peering up front and out her window, seemingly waiting for her hellish ride to end.

Her suffering may have gone unnoticed had not one of the young teenagers posted a 10-minute video of the harassment on YouTube.

FULL STORY.

A Portrait of Part-Time Faculty Members. Full Report.

Full survey of Contingent Faculty Members and Instructors

Another Big Thirsty (Is two in one day allowed?)

Sorry to post one Thirsty next to another, but this one seems to be on a related topic. 

I have been only tangentially following the events at University of Virginia, but I am struck by one puzzling observation.  Most of the faculty at UVa seem to actually like their (former) University President.

The idea of liking one's administration is foreign to me.  The concept of faculty rallying to the defense of of a senior administrator leaves me in an almost Hiram-Like state of bewilderment.

Discuss.

Do you actually like, admire, or otherwise grudgingly respect the president of your university?  Why or Why not?

Beth From Barnes City With a New Big Thirsty. (Yes, We're Still Trying to Keep That Shit Alive.)

I wanted to post a follow up to my prior post:

I am still having trouble with my not-so-new-anymore director. Several things have happened recently. First, the rats are fleeing the sinking ship. People just aren't putting up with his lack of finesse, lack of flexibility, and lack of common sense anymore. That leaves me in a spot where I have tons of responsibility (read: work) dumped in my lap. I am already working at nearly a 2.0 FTE, and now even more has been added on. (Tell that to the guy that says faculty don't do anything).

We teach in a co-teaching type of program. It is a program where we have a group of students that move through the same classes at the same time. We share the responsibilities of teaching all of the courses to these students, supposedly equally with administrative time built in. He allows the work load to be unbalanced. He is afraid to make anyone upset, so he allows some faculty to avoid work under the premise that he is afraid to overstress them or lose them- he's losing them anyway.

He promises those of us who have more than our share of the workload that things will be better, but these are empty promises. He even goes as far as to promise exact things that contradict what he has told another faculty member. (For example, promising the single TA to more than one of us, which can't be done). As a matter of fact, when I took actual facts and figures to him about the unbalanced workload, he suggested I seek counseling for stress. He was even threatening about it, telling me that my job "could" be dependent on it.

He recently had a run in with a student. The student felt uncomfortable in the situation (door closed, raised voices). Granted, the students demands were unreasonable, but the situation wasn't handled well.

Q: What do I do now? Should I take this to the next dean higher; leave it alone and see if it blows over; or something else entirely?

Mod for a Day

Real Goddamned Emails has filled me with a great desire to be CM's mod, at least temporarily.  Can I be mod for a day? I would answer all those damned emails, every one.

Why aren't you putting out more call for posts, or contacting faculty to get new material for the blog.

Because CM is not a fucking hiring committee.  

I have terrible internet service where I am this summer. Would it be really hard for you to maybe email me all the posts individually?

Starbuck's. It's not just for coffee anymore. 

I wouldn't want any reprinted articles, but everything else would be great. I really have a hard time reading it the normal way.

I hear the Sylvan Learning Center can help with that.

I've been reading the blog for three years and nobody has still explained what a thirsty is.

It's all about semen.  I try not to think about it.

Xxxxxxx described a faculty member that sounds a lot like me. I'm sure of it, because I'm in the Xxxxxxx and I was recently at a conference.

Real Goddamned Mail: Summer Edition.

• Do you know how long I've read and supported this blog? Since Fab took a vacation - from what, changing fonts? - the number of posts has plummeted. Why aren't you putting out more call for posts, or contacting faculty to get new material for the blog. Traffic drives blogs. Posts drive traffic. This place is going out of business. All of your shitty ads should just be for half price.
• I have terrible internet service where I am this summer. Would it be really hard for you to maybe email me all the posts individually? I wouldn't want any reprinted articles, but everything else would be great. I really have a hard time reading it the normal way.
• I've been reading the blog for three years and nobody has still explained what a thirsty is.
• Xxxxxxx described a faculty member that sounds a lot like me. I'm sure of it, because I'm in the Xxxxxxx and I was recently at a conference. I think you should warn him about being so obvious. He didn't say anything incriminating, but I don't want my business on the Internet. 
• I'm a student, so I don't expect you to answer. But you are always complaining about students asking stupid questions. I thought there was no such things as a stupid question, only stupid teachers.
• Is there any way to block Xxxxxxx and Xxxxxxxx from commenting on my posts? Every time I put something up, they both chime in with their ridiculous remarks. It's clear they are not talking about the same issue as I am. They're both junior college teachers and I try to clearly show how my question or issue revolves around an R1 school. Their answers aren't just wrong, they actually take the focus off of my question, and then the conversation devolves terribly. I know they have a right to be here, but short of telling them NOT to respond, what can we do?
• You have a graphic that looks like me. Seriously. You used it on the post titled Xxxxxxxxx. I know it's obscured and fuzzy, but I think it actually might be an old faculty page photo of mine. Now, if that's just a little inside joke or something, I guess it's no harm. But I protect my anonymity on here pretty stridently. You didn't use the photo on my post or anything, but I think my face might be a little recognizable to some people and I'd hate to be associated with an angry post.
• What's with this "read more" thing? I had a post up last week that was not terribly long, and you cut it in half with a "read more" link. I think I should be able to decide to put that in there if  I want. I edited it out and now my paragraphs have huge spaces. Don't we have a tacit rule that I'll provide you content if you'll leave my posts alone?
• I have a colleague who DOUSES himself in cologn but never showers. Would that make for a funny story?
• Xxxxxxx is a douchebag. Why do you let him comment on everything? I know you have an IP blocker, and I vote you use it on him. Or Xxxxxxx. She bugs the shit out of me.
• Is there any way you can get Walter back? This place needs a kick in the pants. It is so dull lately with this UVa president thing. That fucking story means nothing to the vast majority of readers, yet you're covering it breathlessly like it was the moon landing or an asteroid coming at the Earth.
• What the fuck is it with hamster fur and that shit?
• Is anyone reading these emails I send?
• Ask Hiram if Joetta included any photos.

Sullivan on Online Education

I started to add this to the comments on marginalia's post below, but didn't want to hijack.  So, here's my favorite line from Teresa Sullivan's statement to UVA's Board of Visitors:

There is room for carefully implemented online learning in selected fields, but online instruction is no panacea. It is surprisingly expensive, has limited revenue potential, and unless carefully managed, can undermine the quality of instruction.

I agree completely.  I teach online, and like it, but only because, at least for the moment, I'm free to craft labor-intensive online classes which center around activities that allow students to discover concepts for themselves, practice skills, and interact regularly and intensively with each other and me.  The focus is not information delivery, and there's no mechanized assessment; feedback comes, in words written specifically for the particular student and/or class, from me and/or their peers.  The vast majority of the class materials are created, and all are chosen/curated,  by the instructor of record -- me -- and are updated in some way, from tweaks to wholesale revisions, every time I teach the course, based on what I observed in the last iteration.  The course is an evolving, organic entity, both during the term, and from term to term.  In short, it's an actual course, not a multimedia textbook with a few interactive elements.

More from the UVa Debacle: Going Out in Style

At least one prominent full professor at UVa, Bill Wulf, has already resigned in protest over the way that the Board of Visitors has handled the firing of Teresa Sullivan and the installation of an interim president after an 11-hr (!) closed-door meeting on Monday. Here's the flava from Wulf's resignation letter:

"By this email I am submitting my resignation, effective immediately. I do not wish to be associated with an institution being as badly run as the current UVa. A BOV that so poorly understands UVa, and academic culture more generally, is going to make a lot more dumb decisions, so the University is headed for disaster, and I don't want to be any part of that. And, frankly, I think you should be ashamed to be party to this debacle!"

The man is plain-spoken. I like his style. I bet his departure will be a loss to UVa, and I hope the school doesn't have to suffer too many more losses like this before the BoV come to their senses (or, better, are replaced). 

Apple Patents Basket-Weaving 'Bots

The Interwebs doesn't
know I'm a pig.

Better begin working on a different emploi de guerre.  Apple has patented a 'bot that convinces the Web you are interested in Basket-Weaving, and not whatever else you are interested in.

Or, We should file a lawsuit, since the four of us have been using 'bots to generate basket-weaving material for a couple years now.  It's hard to do all this work and still have time to clean the compound from the party last week.

The Flava:
"...for example, the cloning service may process an area of interest that is divergent from that of the principal such as an interest in basket weaving. This particular interest may be associated with its own lexicon and actions associated with particular Internet websites, products, services, and/or books. Actions may be defined that permit the cloning service to appear to be the principal [real person] and visit specific basket weaving websites, issue Internet searches related to basket weaving, and the like. This activity by the cloning service may be picked up by an eavesdropper and may be used to generate a polluted profile about the principal that suggests the principal is interested in basket weaving, when in fact this is not the case."

The full repas (from The Reg)

bad tuesday haiku, for the coming solstice

I.

the steady, rising
heat matches my steadily
rising ire; a cloud

of dust rises from
the patio, today's soft
breeze eliciting

more than the breezy
drafts on the table before
me manage to do.

are we doing the
right thing, attempting to teach
when summer beckons,

when every day is
better than any day last
winter?  when each of

us, so easily
distracted by the slightest
breeze, the merest hint

FROM THE SAME EMAIL ADDRESS...

Hello

To start with I'll tell how I managed to find you. I was searching through sites and came across your pictures and I thought that it is there is nothing wrong because people should get to know each other somehow, right?)

So I am Joetta and I hope you will promote my idea and tell me your name.) Since I was first to write I'll tell you something about myself. I'm pretty interesting girl and I'm a person who loves travelling so much that I'm even ready to keep on walking around the entire planet until that verymoment when I'll meet a man who I'd fall in love with and stay with him wherever he goes and whatever happens.

Yeah, you might think that it sounds more like a fairy tale, however I wish it is possible.) Alright, I love meeting new interesting people who may tell me lots of exciting live stories that really happened. So, what can you tell me about yourself? You are pretty, for sure)

What are u interesting in? I hope you won't ignore this message and you'd write me back.) I the perfect time to write me back is... maybe... tomorrow?)) I am really excited about your answer.

Please, write me back.

Talk to you later

[+]

Dear. Mr. Hannah,

I was unable to add your XXX 3101 class for second session. Is there any extra space?

Jo

A Short Evaluative (non) Haiku

Before we make
A decision
About your eval,

Is there anything
That you notice that
You need improvement in,
So that we can include it
In your file?

No, there isn't
Can I go home now?

"Where, exactly, in the assigned reading is the answer?"

I am so frustrated.  In my online class, I have them do one page homework assignments each week.  This week, after we had discussion on several other topics, the homework was about symbolism.  The textbook has a whole section on symbolism, and I like them to show me they understood by giving examples of each kind of symbol from the short stories we have read and discussed. This is made easier by the fact that the textbook gives examples from those same stories.  I never say they can't use the textbook examples even though there are other examples from those same stories (I used to-----but in the end, I am just happy at this point that they are showing me they can read and find the information). It is funny because the better students just automatically find their own examples.

Once thought to be extinct, semicolons now being re-integrated into natural text habitats…

After 30-years on the endangered punctuation list, the semicolon is now at the center of the International Written Language Fund's resettlement program. "The semicolon was near extinction in the late 1970s," says IWLF science director Barry Tomlin. "It is, for the most part, a superfluous vestige of ancient writing habits. It certainly would have died out if English textbooks had simply shut up about it." Student ambitions of intellectualism, based on grammar readers, saved it, however.

The IWLF had all but given up on the semicolon. There had been no confirmed sightings in any published genre of writing since 1995. "The semicolon was deep in the red zone," Tomlin says. "We kept it on the list, but nobody thought it was really still in use. We'd written it off and were more concerned about keeping some semblance of order in existing apostrophe populations. You know, keeping them out of plural habitats, managing overpopulation in slogans and ads." Then a 2010 study that integrated the turnitin.com databank into the English text corpus turned all previous assumptions upside down. "You've heard about when they started pulling up an occasional coelacanth from the Indian Ocean a while back and everyone was excited that the fish was still around. All the experts said the fish had been dead for thousands of years. Well, in 2010, it was like suddenly pulling up hundreds, thousands of coelacanth all at once."

Teaching Loads

I've been pretty silent lately. Creeping around when I can, but I've actually been whole days away from the internet. The end of term was pretty rough and full of enormous stacks of essays as I sailed around multiple universities. Then I had a quick research trip abroad, a family reunion, and a two-day conference before settling into a summer teaching gig.

Oh summer gigs. You know the type of course I mean: 35 students, 5 hours every single bleeding day, supposedly the equivalent of a whole year smashed into the summer months. I suppose the technical number of minutes in class is equal, but it is not the same. It's brutal. People's brains burn out by the third hour. Assigning 3 hours of homework does not allow for careful thought or analysis. For the teacher, it's an exercise in marathon-levels of resistance training.

It makes me think of my first year teaching: working 12-hour days and scrambling constantly to adjust to the abilities of each class while also balancing the necessary alterations of a new institution. It's so much tough work and forced creativity. It just goes and goes and goes, never ending at all.

More on the UVA Debacle

An article by UVA professor Siva Vaidhyanathan in Slate, especially the mention of "strategic dynamism," matches what a UVA-affiliated friend described to me yesterday (which may just mean she had read the Slate article by the time we spoke; the only difference I see is that she described more resistance by the faculty to the new budgeting model).  

Herewith some flava:

In the 19^th century, robber barons started their own private universities when they were not satisfied with those already available. . . .In the 21^st century, robber barons try to usurp control of established public universities to impose their will via comical management jargon and massive application of ego and hubris. At least that’s what’s been happening at one of the oldest public universities in the United States—Thomas Jefferson’s dream come true, the University of Virginia. . . . .

Strategic dynamism, or, as it is more commonly called, “strategic dynamics,” seems to be a method of continually altering one's short-term targets and resource allocation depending on relative changes in environment, the costs of inputs, and the price you can charge for outputs. . . .

The inappropriateness of applying concepts designed for firms and sailboats to a massive and contemplative institution as a university should be clear to anyone who does not run a hedge fund or make too much money. To execute anything like strategic dynamism, one must be able to order people to do things, make quick decisions from the top down, and have a constant view of a wide array of variables. It helps if you understand what counts as an input and an output. Universities have multiple inputs and uncountable and unpredictable outputs. And that’s how we like them. . . .

Both the Kiernan letter and Dragas’ shallow statements discuss the climate facing the university and all public universities in the United States. The problem is, everyone seems to discuss the fact that universities have too little money as if it actually were a matter of climate. . . .It’s not. It’s a matter of politics. States have been making policy decisions for 20 years, accelerating remarkably since the 2007 recession, to cut funding severely, shifting the costs to students and the federal government.  . . .So as tuition peaks and federal support dries up, the only stream still flowing is philanthropy. . . .The reason folks such as Dragas and Kiernan get to call the shots at major universities is that they write huge, tax-deductable checks to them. They buy influence and we subsidize their purchases. . . .
The biggest challenge facing higher education is market-based myopia. Wealthy board members, echoing the politicians who appointed them (after massive campaign donations) too often believe that universities should be run like businesses, despite the poor record of most actual businesses in human history.

Universities do not have “business models.” They have complementary missions of teaching, research, and public service. Yet such leaders think of universities as a collection of market transactions, instead of a dynamic (I said it) tapestry of creativity, experimentation, rigorous thought, preservation, recreation, vision, critical debate, contemplative spaces, powerful information sources, invention, and immeasurable human capital.

Cheat is on at CUNY: Wall Streeters’ GPAs fixed in Baruch forgery funny business.

Chris Koutsoutis allegedly
forged professors’
signatures on
“change of grade” forms.

from the NY Post.

While teaching how corporations cook their books, a CUNY business school was fixing grades.

An administrator at Baruch College’s prestigious Zicklin School of Business forged professors’ names to raise the grade point averages of students seeking master’s degrees to become dealmakers and corporate leaders, The Post has learned.

An internal CUNY probe found the course grades of “approximately 15 students” were falsified to keep their GPAs high enough to stay in the programs, Baruch officials acknowledged.

The trickery prevented enrollees, including many mid-level Wall Streeters whose firms picked up their tabs, from flunking out — and kept their fat tuition checks flowing in.

Read more.